wHaTs oN mY miNd??!

Looking for a TEAMBUILDING FACILITATOR.

2008-11-11T13:07:00.000-08:00

Hi guys. I am currently looking for a teambuilding facilitator to handle activities/programs for a company outing. Please PM me at marielle.magramo@live.com or kitikitiako@yahoo.com.

Please do not send a message here because I wont be able to reply real time (blocked sa office eh hehehe). PMs thru MSN and YMs are much appreciated.

I really need help.

Thanks mucho.

:) Have a great day!

i feel miserable.

2008-10-17T19:19:00.000-07:00

I do. Period.

My Chinese Horoscope

2008-05-08T23:04:00.000-07:00

I am not a believer of Horoscopes but I love reading them. Im also a bit surprised because the description perfectly matches my personality. :)

Chinese Horoscope - marielle's Zodiac Details

THE WATER PIG




Chinese Symbols	Animal Symbol	Ancient Symbol	Element Symbol

	The Pig	The Boar	Water
Brief Description	Pigs are very tolerant, kind and courteous with inner strength. They can be naive and too impulsive at times.
Positive Traits	sensible, sensual and sensitive, sweetly naive, caring, self-sacrificing, erudite, talented, open-handed, candid, outgoing, amusing, charitable, obliging, graciously hospitable and virtuous
Negative Traits	hot-tempered, pessimistic, outrageously epicurean, earthy to a fault, sardonic, snobbish, snide, authoritarian, competitive, know-it-all, stingy, victimized and sometimes downright criminally mad at the world
General Description of All Pigs	"Its better to give than to receive" would probably be the Pig's motto. Pigs are more comfortable giving of their own time or attention than they are to ask others for it. They do not find asking for help an easy task and would rather carry the burden themselves. Pigs will do anything they can to maintain a sense of peace amongst family or friends. This can lead to a tendency to be taken advantage of, but Pigs basically forgive and forget everything. They are compassionate souls who simply want to keep the peace.
Detailed Description of The Water Pig	Water Pigs go with the flow and usually trust people before they truly know them. This, of course, can get them into trouble because they are often too trusting for their own good. Water Pigs are quite easily influenced; yet, can be very persuasive when it comes to getting what they want. These people love parties and social situations and enjoy giving of themselves to help others.

Try it @ Friendster Applications.

This is something nice to know but as always, these are just Horoscopes. Just enjoy reading na lang and do not let your life be run by these.

MRT Today at 7:30 AM

2008-04-28T16:27:00.000-07:00

Tama ba ang naririnig mo? OO sa MRT yan! Ayos ba? Kasi I just got home from work. I’m not yet that sleepy so I've decided to go online muna and upload something very interesting. Hehe. Very interesting kasi natuwa ako when I heard it. Hahaha lakas ba ng trip?! Yan ang effect ng puyat at gutom sakin.

Well natuwa lang ako kasi I used to hear that sa LRT 2 Purple line ba yun. Kaya I realized, this is a first so why not record it? ^^ At least this is something nice kesa sa mga nakakinis na experiences ntin sa MRT diba. I've been riding MRT for almost 4 years na din (kung tama math ko...) and everyday is a struggle for me especially kung rush hours. Pero wala ako magagawa kasi this is the easiest mode of traveling, right? Ayun lang hindi maiiwasan mga nakakainis at nakakatawa(meron nga ba) na experiences sa MRT.

Here are just a few of mine:

1. Ang mga koala.. bow!

Kilala mo itong mga ito. Aba iha.. dancer ka ba ng pole at sinosolo mo yan? Ang pole sa gitna ng MRT ay hawakan. Hindi sandalan. It’s so irritating when someone literally hugs that pole or minsan sinasandalan. Sabi nga ng recording - "Humawak lang po sa matitigas." Paano ka hahawak kung may parang koala na nakayakap dun or mas malala pa me nakasandal na sobrang pawis na pawis pa likod.

2. Wag mo sila salubungin.. di mo sila kamaganak!

Picture this. Palabas ka na ng MRT and then sa harap mo.. mga taong naguunahang papasok. Please lang! Wag ka namang sumabay. Hayaan mo munang lumabas ung nasa loob. Para galing akong airport nyan eh…. salubong ka ng salubong eh.

3. After the airport scene, Amazing Race naman tayo.

Iha.. kasali ka ba sa Amazing Race. Nakakatawa ito especially sa Quezon Ave and Cubao station, unahang maglabasan ang mga tao. Ano premyo nyo?

4. Ah kaya pala Libre!

I love reading Libre. Kaso, sana damihan nyo pa info dun. Kulang kasi sa balita. I mean, ang dami dami nyong patrons to do this simple thing.

5. No water supply.

Ito na lang lagi kong nababasa sa CR ng Boni Station. Hay. Dito ba napupunta taxes ko?

6. MRT Records.

Okay na ngayon ung recording. Parang LRT 2 Purple. Professional ang dating. Dati kasi bisaya si manong Driver... Shoo station daw... Ano daw? Shaw pala. Or masama.. Buni station. Haha! Minsan naman nanggugulat... parang announcer na sobrang lakas mag announce. Minsan naman, bumubulong Or minsan - maling station sasabihin. Kuya, okay ka lang? Sa sounds naman, nasaan na ung MRT Radio dati. Nawala na yata. I can’t forget the song nung pasko. Christmas in our Hearts. LSS ko lagi yan hahaha! Panalo. Intro pa lang.. alam ko na....

7. MRT Slot Machine

MRT Admins, ayusin nyo naman yung single journey tickets nyo. Minsan nag pasok ako ng 50 pesos sa Purple train - hala puro piso sinukli sa 15 pesos ko. Ano to Casino Filipino. Hahaha! Jackpot!

8. Philippine Dental Association

Hmmm. Paminsan minsan me nakaksakay akong lovers na sobrang PDA. Naghahalikan at nag aakapan. Kung san san na humahawak yung lalake. Kulang na lang maghubad silang pareho. Get a room naman! Hindi kame naiinggit sa inyo. Nakakadiri at nakakainis kayo. GRrrh!

9. Titanic the Movie

Remember this scene.. ung kamay sa salamin hahah grabeh! I really hate rush hour. Maski sa 1st train kasi -sobrang siksikan. And nakakapagtaka - bakit nagsisisiksikan kayo sa may door. Sa gitna ang luwag luwag naman! Grrh!

10. Checking of Bags

Ito pa - natatawa na lang ako. Napaka-ningas cogon talaga ng Pinoy. Remember nung uso ung bomb threat. Sobra sila nag check ng bag. Ngayon wala tinutusok lang ng stick yung loob ng bag mo. Anong klaseng checking yan. Magseseryoso lang kayo magcheck pag me bomb threat na ulit. hayyyyy!

11. Grooming... inside the MRT???

Ito nakakatawa. Once I wasn’t able to bring my ipod so I have no choice but to listen and observe people sa MRT just to kill time. I heard someone clipping nails. So shmepre nagulat ako - hello MRT Etiquette. Why in all places sa MRT pa. Nung nakita ko ung guy.. nag gugupit ng kuko... SA PAA! Promise.. everyone was really shocked and nagparinig na ugn iba. Ayun nahiya.. bumaba. This really grossed me out. Hayy!

12. Habulin ng plantsa.

Don’t you hate it when you ride the MRT feeling fresh with your crisp and clean clothes and PAGLABAS mo.. para kang ni-rape ng sampung kabayo? Hayy. Pero mas gusto ko nang ganito sa UMAGA (sa first train ha) kesa naman pag uwi na. Oh my goodness. Imagine mo nlng amoy araw at pawis mga katabi mo...

Ayun last na hirit. Do you know na you can greet (or maybe request a song)? Just send an email daw - mrtradio@audiowav.com. Ma-try nga haha!

Ikaw, ano experiences mo? ^^

Wanna Googol me?

2008-04-15T23:00:00.000-07:00

Hahaha! Before you think of anything else... *what a filthy mind tsk tsk* ... read on...

I just read a very interesting trivia last night. Its about... dyaraaann... you are right -- Googol! No, I am not having problems pronouncing it, nor am I referring to an alien or creature from Tumbuktu.... but I swear, there is really such a word. Pramis!

I know you are all familiar with 1 million, 1 billion, 1 trillion and 1 quadrillion. But do you know what comes after these?

Hahah I used to say 1 zillion when I was younger...me katulad ba ako? I thought there was such a word. Heheheh. Wala pala. Argh!

So moving forward... here are the rest of the terms:

1 quintillion, 1 sextillion, 1 septillion, 1 octillion, 1 nonillion....

and our most awaited.. largest number.........

1 googol!

This is the largest number - 1 followed by 100 zeroes:

100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.

Pakibilang ha. And yes, paki correct ung comma after nung one and move the zeroes na lang.

Hehehe!

Crazy Things for Your Home

2008-04-15T22:38:00.000-07:00

The Banana Guard

Because it’s always best to be protected. Believe me, bananas that get squished by sandwiches and drinks in a lunch box isn’t a pretty sight.

-- oo nga naman, ayoko ng lamog na saging.. clever.. very clever....

Clocky

Remember that kid who taunted you and ran away from you when you chased him? This alarm clock is sort of like that. It jolts you from your sleep and allows you no snooze-button time. Perhaps chasing it around your room can make for morning exercise too.

-- bagay to sakin ah.... chasin round the house hahaha

Throwzini’s Knife Block

For frustrated circus knife throwers everywhere. It even spins! Poor little red guy.

-- tamang pang alis ng boredom

Nose Pencil Sharpener

The only time kids are allowed to pick noses in public. Warning: Sharpening pencils will trump doing homework. Then again anything trumps doing homework.

-- hahaha! i lab this one!

Arty Party Paper Plates

For every kid who wants to play with their food. Time to take out the mayo, mustard and ketchup! Arm the kids with fries or carrot sticks. And I wonder if this comes with a beret.

Heart Shaped Teacup

Wake up to a lovely Valentine’s Day morning with tea. No need for sugar. This quaint teacup fills up the sweetness quotient of your day.

-- sweeet naman!

Onion Holder

Because onions don’t only make you cry, they stubbornly roll away too.

Din-Ink

So ideas don’t get lost during mealtimes. Just make sure there’s no soup in your spoon before you excitedly jot down our ideas on your placemat.

Daisy Egg Molder

Because round eggs are boring.

-- oo boring ang bilugang itlog! :P

Banana Slicer

And finally, because we started with bananas, let’s end with bananas. Perfect for those who are impatient with their fruit.

--- gawaing tamad....

Thanks for sharing this one, Kim. :)

Why Sick People Forward Messages

2008-04-04T03:26:00.000-07:00

from vlyzah84

I want to thank all of you who have
taken the time and trouble to send me
your damn chain letters and forwarded
emails over the past few years. Yes,
thank you, thank you, thank you from the
bottom of what's left of my heart for
making me feel safe, secure, blessed,
and wealthy.

Because of your concern....

I no longer drink Coca Cola because it
can remove toilet stains.

I no longer drink anything out of a can
because I will get sick from the rat
feces and urine.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the
microwave because it causes cancer.

I no longer check the coin return on pay
phones because I could be pricked with a
needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer-causing
deodorants even though! I smell like a
water buffalo on a hot day.

I no longer use margarine because it's
one molecule away from being plastic.

I no longer go to shopping malls because
someone will drug me with a perfume
sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or
FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda
in disguise.

I no longer answer the phone because
someone will ask me to dial a stupid
number for which I will get the phone
bill from hell with calls to Jamaica,
Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer eat KFC because their
chickens are actually horrible mutant
freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer date the opposite sex
because they will take my kidneys and
leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full
of ice.

I no longer buy expensive cookies from
Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.

I no longer worry about my soul because
I have 363,214 angels looking out for me
and St. Theresa's novena has granted my
every wish.

Thanks to you, I have learned that God
only answers my prayers if I forward an
email to seven of my friends and make a
wish within five minutes. (Geez, the
BIBLE did not mention it works that way!)

I no longer have any savings because I
gave it to a sick girl who is about to
die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th
time).

I no longer have any money at all, but
that will change once I receive the
$15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are
sending me for participating in their
special e-mail program.

Yes, I want to thank all of you
soooooooo much for looking out for me!

I will now return the favor.

If you don't send this message to at
least 1200 people in the next 10
seconds, a large bird with diarrhea will
crap on your head at 5:00 PM this
afternoon and the fleas of a thousand
camels will infest your armpits.

I know this will occur because it
actually happened to a friend of a
friend of a friend of a friend of a
friend of a friend of a friend of my
next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's
8th husband's 2nd cousin's 3rd husband's
ex-wife's mother's beautician!

------
haha! lagot na!

Announcement:

2006-10-25T21:18:00.000-07:00

Please check out my alternative blog by clicking this.

Thanks.

My Little Mumbles

2006-10-04T13:57:00.000-07:00

I received a call this afternoon. Gawd! I thought it was just an ordinary call from a landline - turned out to be that its from Emerson. I sent my resume to them last week and I really wasnt expecting them to reply this fast. Its not that I do not like to work in my present company anymore. This is a career move and I want to work on a company that is in line with the course I finished. I want to be trained as a Computer Engineer and I want to achieve something more that what I can do now, and most of all I want to grow...(go grow glow!^^)

I was shivering as I took the call and got tongue tied as I try very hard to converse in English. Speaking fluently in english is really one of my weaknesses. I cant finish three sentences without the Uhm's, Ahs, etc. The caller (her name is Julie) asked me the usual questions about myself, the company I work to and the job I do. And then she scheduled me for an exam this Friday at 10:30 AM! Aaaaaaaaaargh! Im so excited and nervous at the same time. I am really reaaaaally not used to being interviewed and interrogated!!! ! So here I am still awake at the wee hours of the morning browsing and researching about Emerson (and yes I am also browsing for interview tips hehehe). I am soooooo dead! Grhhh. Lord help me! Wait for the result on Friday. Please pray for me and wish me luck. I need it badly!

---------
September 28 will really be one of the days that I WILL NEVER EVER (as in!) forget in my entire life.

My work starts at 10 am, so I make sure that around 845 AM, I am already out of the house. Unfortunately, I really cant wake up by myself so I have my mom to wake me up every single day. This particular day she told me - Wala kayong pasok. She said that while Im on my half awake and half asleep state. I glanced at the clock and I literally jumped off the bed as I read it was already 845 AM! I prepared to leave as in nakaligo ako in 5 minutes sa sobrang madali ko. And I dont want to break my record - I was never late since I was promoted. Arrg! This will be the first time T_T. Well I heard that there will be a storm and all but hey - the sky is clear and there aint no sign of storm yet - May pa eye eye of the storm pa kayo jan! So I went to work and took the MRT. The usual scenario, people keep on squashing me - porket maliit ako hmp - and pushing me as I get in the train. And then signs started showing. At Santolan Station, we had stopover for 15 minutes. And then I heard the "DJ" of the train say - "Pasensha na po at hanggang Shaw lang po tayo at walang kuryente sa Taft". Bigla nagkalat ang butiki sa MRT. Everyone was tsk tsking (pinoy nga!). So my mood was already reaaaaalyy bad but I cant do anything db. So I took the bus from Shaw and yes! I arrived at exatly 1130 AM! Late ako! And I was really dugyot kasi pagod n ako, pawis pa, naiinis pa ako. Then my officemates told me "Sana d ka na pumasok." Grhhh! Sana nga I didnt na lang. Pero mahal ko trabaho ko.. Naks! ^^

Then lunch time came and the "live show" started.

I was on the 8th Floor and I can see everything thats happening around the Fort. It was really raining cats and dogs and --- yero! Yeah you read it right. Roofings were flying everywhere because the wind was really sooooo strong. All employees were actually near the windows to witness this extraordinary happening. Nakadikit na nga nose namen sa window. Scary kasi tuwing pumapalo ung wind feeling mo mawawasak salamin namen. Aw pag nawasak un.. mahihila kame palabas. Joskolord! And worst of all pa, yung mga nanahimik na cars ng officemates ko, ayun naliparan ng yero. Not only naliparan, its like nang aasar pa kasi ginagasgas nya talaga ung mga hood nila. May isa pa nabasag ang windows and nagpaestimate na sila hundred bucks ang kelangan para ipaayos. The other one got his Vios just 2 months ago - nagasgasan din.Whew! Makes me feel relieved wala ako kotse. Har har har! Kidding po. Then I was also observing ung post ng Mcdonalds. Deba meron sila poste na meron Big M na logo nila with the word Mcdonalds sa baba noon. Nagtatawanan kame because inaabangan namen mawala ung letters nya. Ayun naging Mcdonal.. naging Mcdo.. then Mc.. hanggang nilipad na sha lahat. There was also this delivery boy of Chowking. He was wearing his jacket pabaliktad and nasa likod ung zipper nung jacket. Eh ung wind was coming from behind him patulak. So ang lakas lakas ng wind diba. Ang ginawa nya tumalon sha from his motorcyle at tumakbo na lang. If he didnt jump kasi, delikado lang sha.

Below are some pictures of the impact of Milenyo(special thanks to Eric Rosales):

Create Your Own!

It was truly an unforgettable experience.

Siguro we were all in awe in shock pero I know deep inside we are not enjoying the things were seeing. Sino ba gusto ng magasgasan or masaktan dbah. It made me realize how lucky I am again. I am lucky because I live in a house and not a shanty that can be easily run down by strong winds. Ikaw? whats your realization during that time?

---------
I am dead again!

With James and Maru, we decided to make a pustahan worth five thousand pesos!!!!!!!!! And its all about "pagpapapayat in 2 months!!!!!!!!!!!!" OH MY GOD! Thats a lot of bucks and I dont want to lose that big amount of money. So I am really thinking on how to lose weight. But you see, I never experienced being slim. I am chubby eversince. Add to that fact that I cant say no to sweets - san ako papunta sa pustahan namen???!!!! I wont bring my usual baon tomorrow. Ill have Skyflakes instead. Ugh. Kakayanin ko kaya. Then I wont buy crepes na. Ive been eating crepes straight for 2 days. Pass muna ako tomorrow. Grrh! I just wish the bet was only 20 pesos. Babayaran ko na sila. Hehehe.

---------
Have you ever experienced feeling like you dont have anything to do anymore at work. I mean you already finished your pending cases and all and you find yourself staring at the computer monitor waiting for Sadako - ay TV pala yon. Anyways, I had the same feeling kanina. So I did the following to eat up my time:

1. I cleaned by bookmarks. I created folders and junked there the bookmarks depending on their classification. I am the kind of person who loves to browse and bookmark sites I find interesting. Ang haba haba na pala ng bookmarks ko. Mine were You Tube videos, Glitter text for instant testimonial sa mga nanghihingi, lyrics of songs na di ko makanta ng tama yung lyrics (example is check up on it.. na kinakanta ni Dex na ... wacha wacha...hahahhaha), blogs ng friends ko na I want to tag sa blogspot ko, html programming codes for Frienster and template ko sa Blogspot, Click the City for movies and restos, Cisco Networking links (sa pag aaral ko kunyare ^^) and madame pa. O dba, ngayon mas maayos na itsura. =)

2. I deleted friends I do not know from my two Friendster accounts. I used to approve some even if I barely know them. Scary. Mamaya hired killer pala yun. Hahah kidding.

3. I cleaned my Desktop. Grabeh. I have so many unused files na nagtetake up ng memory ng PC ko. Grabeh! I can me likened to a basurera. Collect ng collect ng files.

4. I opened the Notepad and told myself - makapagsulat nga sa blog.

5. I researched for place na pede pag outingan ng guild. I am planning a two day outing! Your suggestion is much appreciated. =)

Presto! I made something useful on my spare time. Wag lang dadaan si Boss Jivs. =)

I dont like to take my 15 minute break kasi. Dati when I take it, I end up going down the building and smoke. Quit na ako mag smoke. Inom na lang! ^^

---------
I am happy with my love life. Surprised? I know you have been a silent witness of my heartaches that Ive written on my blogs and you want to tell me - Di nga?! (sabay batok ba?) Honestly I am happy. And contented. Oh db hindi ako makontento dati? (No naman.. I was just looking for that something that no words can define....lols) Funny nga eh. Kasi he was really used to my missed calls and emails and texts. Eh I felt I was taken for granted. So what I did was I was no longer sending him emails and I seldom give him a ring. Weeee. Look at us now. Namiss nya ako. Hindi sha sanay na I dont email him. Na i dont make papansin. Hehe ayun namiss nya ako. Effective pala yun. =) I just cant help but miss him everyday. Pero he needs to work for our family. Dont worry honey... I will wait for you. I promise that. Love you honey! =)

---------
I am having problem with an ex. Its not a problem naman. Its just that... it seems to be disturbing. He wants us to meet and make kamustahan. I told him - what for? Dbah. What for? Bakit pa? Para saan? I was kinda rude on the phone because when he asked me how am I doing, I told him - "Okay naman hindi na ako uto uto unlike before." Hahah. Ang sama sama ko. Pero dba.. the logic. Why should I see him pa. Its already a closed book. I cannot say that I regret having a relationship with him because everything happens in our lives for a reason. And I wont meet my hon if there was no "us" before. Its just that - its already a closed chapter and Im actually reading a new book right now that I will read over and over again for the rest of my life. What could be the best thing to do, huh?

Yehey!

2006-09-22T15:46:00.000-07:00

Yehey! Today is my day off! Thank God I have 2 days away from the log catcher. Paano ba naman, I spend almost 45 hours a week in front of the PC. Halos nakadikit na nose ko sa monitor and everytime I shift my gaze away from it, parang nakikita ko pa ren yung lines ng Excel sa dingding. Whew! Sa wakas ... here I am having the luxury to wake up at 11 AM during Fridays and Saturdays! Heaven talaga...

Makes me think the things I do during day off:

1. I do the household chores. Kainis... nakakatamad.. pero kailangan... I need to be an obedient daughter kahit friday saturday lang. Hehehe. Usually ang ginagawa ko lang naman:

a. Wipe the windows and yung porch.
b. Bathe the dogs.
c. Clean my room.
d. Help in cooking food (and endless tikim ng niluluto).

Hmmm.. konti lang pala.. pero kahet na. :P

2. I do errands and I pay my bills kasi bukas pa mga banko by that time. Minsan naman (or madalas) guild eb ng Solo at PUNIETTA guild. And when I say guild EB.. kasama na jan inuman at kung anu anu pa. Kaso bawal na ako uminom and yosi.. kaya... good girl muna =) So lakwatsa days ko ang day off ko and Divisoria date with Maru. =)

3. Sometimes I also play MU sa bahay kapag wala magawa. Play nga ba or chatmode... weeeeeeeee!

Miss ko na character ko:

I miss yung addict modes namen. Yung walang tulugan. Kaya nga nagkaloko loko college days ko. Hahaha. Pero Im glad, dahil sa MU I had friends na until now kasa kasama ko pa ren.

4. I maximize my Fridays/Saturdays by eating.... Yeah oo na pagkaen na naman. Its because I really dont eat well sa office. I mean I dont get to eat "good" food. Pano ba naman araw araw na lang Lord, chips and sweet ang pinapapak namen. Eto pa... alam mo yung tipong kakakaen lang namen lunch ng 1 PM maya maya maghahanapan ng food then me magdedeliver ng meryenda. Hayy. Walang kapaguran ang mga tao ngumuya ng ngumuya. Hahahah.

So tuwing day off.. food trip ako sa bahay. Then I cleanse with tea (secret kung ano yun! ^^). Day off ko lang pede inumin ung tea kasi delikado ... baka magkalat ako sa office. Hehehe.

So come and think of it. Friday ngayon. And Im off to a dinner date with my friends tonight at 7pm. Then tomorrow, dinner date with my college friends. Yey. c",)

Happy Birthday Dear Erik! =)

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

I am a person who gets irritated easily. I swear! I dont like waiting, I dont like queue and I am very very impatient. Small things irritate me easily. But the truth is I am trying to change. It just gets too irritating its taking me a long time to do so. :P

Things that irritated and (surprised me) this week:

1. I open my closet and "suplayz suplayz!!!"... I found myself staring at a pile of pink shirts and blouses. Aaaaaargh! Yes I like that color but I never thought I could be this so avid fan of the color pink! And I was wondering why officemates are telling me, "Favorite color mo ang pink noh." And now I know why. Its just that pink is the first color I notice in a department store. Aw color blind na ata ako. Hahaha.

Ill remind myself next tym not to buy pink anymore! GRhhh!!!

2. Doesnt it irritate you when while in FX or wherever na meron sounds... me kakanta bigla at sasabayan yung song sa radio. Yung tipong naiiyak ka na sa kanta tapos meron sisira sa mood mo. Ito kagabi lang... the song "Even Now" by Barry Manilow was playing on this FX on the way to Welcome....

Lyrics goes:

Even now when I have come so far
I wonder where you are
I wonder why it’s still so hard without you
Even now when I come shining through
I swear I think of you
And how I wish you knew
Even now

And then all of a sudden yung katabe ko blurted out his version:

Ebeeen naaawww when aaaay haabbb gone so parr
aaaay waaander where you aaaare
aaaay waaaander why etssss still so haaaard wiiidawwwwt you
Ebeeen naaawww when aaaay come comingggg truuuuu
aaaay swear aaaay theeenk of you
And how aaaay weeezzzz you knew
Ebeeen naaawww

Hayyy. Papatayin pa ata nito si Barry Manilow. :P

3. Have you started the day with the sun shining at its brightest that you dont even think twice of leaving your umbella at home. It happens to me all the time. Bute na lang wala na ako room for melanin kaya I am no longer affected ng darkening effect of the sun. Hahaha. So I didnt bring any umbrella kasi naman ang tikas ni Mr. Sun. Then out of nowhere, nung uwian na... ang galing... ang lakas lakas ng ulan. Hayyy.

Moral Lesson: Bring your umbrella no matter how sunny it is.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Funny realization.

I remember crying to death when I lost this guy whom I shared my 3 yrs of existence with. Grabeh. I was almost thinking about suicide that time. I was so distraught that I can no longer distinguish right from wrong. Those were the days that I cry whenever I hear songs we used to sing, meet people we both know and visit the places we used to hang out before. I also had relationships that I thought would make me forget about the pain and assure myself, "this is the right guy all along". Now after almost 2 years I got an email from him. And guess what, I didnt feel any pain at all. I was just as happy as he is right now.

I am proud to say I moved on! =)

Kain na nga ako.....

EXs: Join me @ Mobius Live by CLICKING THIS.

How to find happiness...

2006-09-03T19:29:00.000-07:00

When one door of happiness closes, another opens
but often we look so long at the closed door
that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.

Paano mo nasabing mahal mo na sha?

2006-09-01T19:53:00.000-07:00

lifted from a friend's email

PAALALA PO HA...

eto eh galing sa isang taong...
hindi sa nakikielam...
pero gusto lang makatulong...
(SANA naman)...
at makapagbigay ng opinyon...

uulitin ko lang ha...

wala sanang masaktan...

KATOTOHANAN lang...

______________________
----------------------

HINDI BA KAYO NATATAKOT???...
as in sa mga bagay-bagay...
hello??...
getz,...
saan pa ba..
kundi sa mga LOVE life issues...
na tipong imbis na maging seryosong usapan...
eh nagiging pang-"TELESERYE" pa ang dating...

don't you know that it's not something to "LAUGH" about...
it involves PEOPLE..
people with feelings...

nws...
ang akin lang naman eh..
based from experiences ha!...

ang love ay hindi minamadali...
hindi pinipilit..
at lalong hindi kina-career...

IT COMES NATURALLY...
(hahaha... take it from me!!!... )

as in magugulat ka na lang isang araw...
magigising na SIYA ang nasa isip mo...
hindi pinilit na isipin ha...
basta NAISIP mo na lang basta...
mapapangiti ka na lang...
at basta na lang gagaan ang pakiramdam mo...
na tipong kahit mukha ka ng tanga...
eh ok lang sayo...
ngiti ka pa rin...

hindi nababase sa tagal ng pinagsamahan...
hindi rin sa dalas ng pagkikita...
hindi rin sa ilang beses na pagkakausap sa phone...
lalung-lalo nang hindi sa dalas ng pagte-text...

may MAGIC kasi yan eh...
magic na hindi naka-cast ng kung sinuman...
MAGIC na matagal na palang nandun...
hindi mo lang namamalayan...

isusugal mo ba yun???...
yung feeling na sobrang wala ka ng hahanapin pang iba???...
papabayaan mo bang masira yun???...

ASA PA!!!...

kaya nga eto lang yun eh...
wag na kasi kayong magmadali...

unang-una...

PAANO MO BA NASABING MAHAL MO NA SIYA???...

dahil ba natutuwa ka sa kanya???...
o kaya naman naaaliw ka???...
naswee-sweetan ka ba ng sobra sa kanya???...
kinikilig ka ba pag nakikita mo siya???...
at nahi-high kapag naririnig mo na ang boses niya???...

eh teka muna...
baka naman infatuated ka lang....
o kaya naman kagaya nga ng sagot mo...
BAKA naaaliw ka lang...
dahil kakaiba siya...
may spark na hindi mo maintindihan...

tsk!!!...
ang saklap nyan!...

pangalawa...

GAANO MO NA BA SIYA KAKILALA???...

madali ba siyang mapikon???...
pano ba siya mabadtrip???...
madali bang mahalata na may topak siya???...
ano bang suot niya pag nasa bahay siya???...
shorts ba o pantalon???...
nakasando ba siya o naka-t-shirt lang???...
matagal ba siyang maligo???....
kumakain ba siya ng vegetables???...
tamad ba siya???...
mas gusto ba niyang manood ng tv kaysa magbasa ng libro???...
nagpe-play station ba siya???...
tatlo ba ang pamangkin niyang lalaki???...
makukulit ba yung mga kamag-anak niya???...
green ba ang kulay ng gate ng bahay nila???...
sa village ba siya nakatira???...
may sakayan ba ng jeep na malapit sa kanila???...
nagsisimba ba siya linggo-linggo???...
kasama ba yung pamilya niya???...
at nagdadasal ba siya bago matulog???...

in short...
alam mo na nga ba???...
ang mga bagay-bagay...
ang mga simpleng bagay tungkol sa kanya...
na nagdedetermine ng sarili niya...
as in kung sino ba talaga SIYA...

pangatlo...

KAYA MO BA SIYANG TANGGAPIN???...

as in TANGGAPIN ng buong-buo...

sa lahat ng trip niya sa buhay...
sa lahat ng katopakan niya...
sa lahat ng pag-iinarte at pag-dadrama niya...
sa lahat ng kasalanang nagawa, ginawa, at gagawin pa lang niya...
sa lahat ng naiisip niya...
sa lahat ng sasabihin niya...
sa kilos niya...
sa pananamit pa pala niya...
sa pagsasalita...
sa pananaw niya sa buhay...
sa pagtrato niya sa tao...
sa lifestyle niya...
sa uri ng pamilyang meron siya...
sa uri ng kaibigang kasa-kasama niya...
sa style niya pagdating sa love...
sa kasweetan niyang natural...
sa paglalambing niya...
sa tawa niyang pagkalakas-lakas...
sa manners niya...
sa pagmumura niya...
sa bisyo niya kung meron man...
sa mga pang-aasar niya sayo...
sa style niya pagdating sa pagsolve ng problema...
sa problemang maaari ka ring masama...

pang-apat...

KAYA MO BANG MAGING TOTOO???...

kaya mo bang makita yung sarili mo...
na kasama pa rin siya ha...
sa isang sitwasyong pag naisip mo eh...
mapapaiyak ka na lang sa sakit...
nang dahil din sa kanya???...

kaya mo bang magmukhang tanga...
as in umiyak ng dahil sa kababawan...
ibuhos ang mga nararamdaman mo...
kahit na puro kababawan nga lang naman...
as in kahit sa harapan niya???...

kaya mo bang maging barubal pag kasama mo siya???...
yung tipo bang wala ka ng pakielam...
mawala man ang manners mo...
na wala ka naman talaga...

in short...

KAYA MO BANG MAGING IKAW KAPAG KASAMA MO NA SIYA???...

yung tipong hindi ka nahihiyang ipakita kung sino ka
talaga...

dahil alam mong...

HINDI MO LANG SIYA TANGGAP...

TANGGAP KA RIN NIYA...

BUONG-BUO RIN...

MGA TAO!!!...
tama na kasi ang trip...
tama na ang pagmamadali...
oo masarap ngang mainvolve sa isang tao...
pero diba mas masarap yun...

LALO NA KUNG ALAM MONG TOTOO YUNG NARARAMDAMAN MO...

Blog Dilemma

2006-09-01T19:32:00.000-07:00

Im busy now adays for my blog reconstruction. I think I'll stick to the movable type. Ive been having feedbacks about viewing problem lately. Aaaarghh! Anyone there who could lend me a hand?

See u again!

I am not a picture addict! Promise! =)

2006-08-29T22:37:00.000-07:00

| Vi ew | Add Favorite

135 Things You Do Not Know

2006-08-28T13:46:00.000-07:00

1- Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

2- Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

3- There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

4- The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

5- A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

6- There are more chickens than people in the world.

7- The longest one-syllable word in the English language is "screeched."

8- On a Canadian two-dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag. (I guess that's why we use 2 dollar coins now)

9- All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are stuck on 4:20.

10- No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver or purple.

11- "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

12- Almonds are a member of the peach family.

13- There are only 4 words in the English language which end in "dous":tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

14- A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

15- An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

16- Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

17- In most advertisements, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.

18- Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

19- The characters Bert & Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "It's a Wonderful Life."

20- A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

21- A goldfish has a memory span of 3 seconds.

22- It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

23- The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.

24- In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.

25- The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

26- The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.

27- There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.

28- The average human eats 8 spiders in their lifetime at night.

29- A cockroach can live nine days without its head before it starves to death.

30- A polar bear's skin is black. Its fur is not white, but actually clear.

31- Elvis had a twin brother named Aaron, who died at birth, which is why Elvis' middle name was spelled Aron: in honor of his brother. It is also misspelled on his tomb stone.

32- Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants.

33- More people are killed by donkeys annually than are killed in plane crashes.

34- Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.

35- Shakespeare invented the words "assassination" and "bump."

36- Marilyn Monroe had 6 toes on one foot.

37- If you keep a goldfish in the dark room, it will eventually turn white.

38- Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

39- Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do.

40- The sentence "the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter in the English language.

41- The names of the continents all end with the same letter with which they start.

42- TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters on only one row of the keyboard.

43- The word racecar and kayak are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left.

44- A snail can sleep for 3 years.

45- American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.

46- The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

47- Vatican City is the smallest country in the world with a population of 1,000 and a size of 108.7 acres.

48- "I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

49- No president of the United states was an only child. And last and definitely most important:

50- The average chocolate bar has 8 insects' legs in it.

51- A rat can last longer without water than a camel.

52- Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks

or it will digest itself.

YUCK!

53- The dot over the letter " i " is called a tittle.

54- A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top.

55- A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find a mate.

I know some people like that!

56- A duck's quack doesn't echo. No one knows why.

57. A 2 X 4 is really 1-1/2 by 3-1/2.

58. During the chariot scene in "Ben Hur", a small red car can be seen in the distance.

59. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents daily!

60. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.

61. Because metal was scarce, the Oscars given out during World War II were made of wood.

62. The number of possible ways of playing the first four moves per side in a game of chess is 318,979,564,000.

63. There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with orange, purple and silver.

64. The name Wendy was made up for the book "Peter Pan". There was never a recorded Wendy before.

65. The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin in World War II killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.

66. If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.

Who was the sadist who discovered this??

67. Bruce Lee was so fast that they actually had to s-l-o-w the film down so you could see his moves. That's the opposite of the normal.....today.

68. The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA".

69. The original name for butterfly was flutterby.

70. The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.

WHAT???

71. The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles. At that time, the most known player on the market was Victrola, so they called themselves Motorola.

72. Roses may be red, but violets are indeed violet.

73. By raising your legs slowly and laying on your back, you cannot sink into quicksand. GOOD FACT TO REMEMBER?? Maybe next time...

74. Celery has negative calories. It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with.

75. Charlie Chaplin once won third prize in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest.

76. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.

77. Sherlock Holmes NEVER said "Elementary, my dear Watson".

78. An old law in Bellingham, Washington, made it illegal for a woman to take more than 3 steps backwards while dancing.

?????

79. The glue on Israeli postage is certified kosher.

80. The Guinness Book of Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from Public Libraries.

81. Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go out into space because passing wind in spacesuits damages them. Not to mention the other drawback to farting in such a confined space....

82. Bats always turn left when exiting a cave!!

83. Mosquito repellents don't repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito's sensors so they don't know you're there.

84. Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.

85. The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as substitute for blood plasma.

86. No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.

87. Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.

88. You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

89. Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.

90. The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.

91. The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.

92. A Boeing 747s wingspan is longer than the Wright brother's first flight.

93. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating 1 olive from each salad served in first-class.

94. Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

95. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

96. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

97. Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.

98. The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.

99. Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.

100. Marilyn Monroe had six toes.

101. All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn't like being seen wearing them in public.

102. Walt Disney was afraid of mice.

103. Pearls melt in vinegar.

104. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.

105. The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

106. It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.

107. A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.

108. The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.

109. Richard Millhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all the letters from the word "criminal." The second was William Jefferson Clinton.

110. Turtles can breathe through their butts.

111. Butterflies taste with their feet.

112. In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all of the world's nuclear weapons combined.

113. On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year.

114. On average people fear spiders more than death.

115. Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.

116. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.

117. Only one person in two billion will live to be 116
or older.

118. Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

119. It's physically impossible for you to lick your
elbow.

120. The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

121. A snail can sleep for three years.

122. No word in the English language rhymes with "MONTH."

123. Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches.

124. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing. SCARY!!!

125. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

126. All polar bears are left handed.

127. In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes.

128. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

129. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

130. "Go," is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

131. If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall. Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.

132. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

133. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

134. Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.

135. Almost everyone who reads this email will try to lick their elbow. (Hehehe ako yun! ^_^)

Nightmare

2006-08-27T16:36:00.000-07:00

With my eyes still closed I tried to look for my phone under my pillow. Oh no, its only 10:35 pm! Ooops I almost forgot that the time on my phone is 4 hours late. Shempre time ng Dubai yun eh! I stood up and figured out that its actually 2:35 in the morning. Joskolord! This would be just another one of my sleepless nights. Don’t tell me there’s a reason why I’m still awake. Hindi na naman ako makakatulog ulit nito! Hmpft! Grrrrh!

Just when I was about turn on one side, I glanced at the ring on my finger, a very simple and not so expensive one that Jaime bought for me. He wears a similar one. Hmm sinusuot kaya nya yung ring namen?! For me it is not just a simple piece of silver, but a symbol of love. Oo na korny na, pero it means a lot to me. It reminds me of a promise that we made for each other. Joskolord namimiss ko na naman ang honey ko!

I knew it. Hindi na ako makakatulog ulit so naupo na lang ako sa kama and tinuloy ang daydreaming ko. Daydreaming? Gabi na ah??!!! Hahahha. Bsta! Anyways, I never imagined myself in a long distance relationship. I mean in the past relationships I had I always find comfort in knowing someone is present beside me. When I say present it means “physically”. This is my first time to be in this kind of relationship. But then again everything happens for a reason. And I don’t have any regrets for all that we’ve been through. But then I’ve been thinking about the “what-ifs” in my life. What if I was a very obedient daughter? What if I listened to my parents and relatives when they were giving me advices? What if I had a father and had a complete home? What if I became a valedictorian or a magna cum laude in school? What if I didn’t work in the company I’m working for today? What if my ex-boyfriend wasn’t married yet? What if I didn’t meet Jaime? What if I didn’t fell in love with him?

At some points of my life I know there had been a LOT of mistakes. There had been a lot of regrets and there had been a couple of what ifs. But joskolord! Now I know everything has a reason. From that moment that you were a second late from catching that MRT train to the moment that your coffee stained your favorite shirt to forgetting something at home that you needed to go back even though you’re already in a hurry… Yes I know. Everything around us has a magical reason behind it and all we’ve got to do is believe – that something good is coming.

The story of my life can already be featured in Maalala Mo Kaya -- sino kaya artista kukunin ko na gaganap na Marielle? Siguro si Judy Ann Santos? Ay chubby yun, sexy ako! Hmm Bea Alonzo? Hmmm Angelica Panganiban? Ano ba y un? Hahaha. I’ve been through hell and all, but here I am, still striving to pursue my aspirations in life. Whatever I’ve gone through will lead me to something I am looking forward to. Guess what?! It also led me to Jaime! Biro mo kung d ko nakilala mga ex ko d ko sha makilala! Joskolord!

I know I’m pointless here. See there’s a reason why I am awake. I was given a chance to realize things I should be happy off. Hayy joskolord! Makatulog na nga! 12:00 am na pala… oh no…. 4:00 am na. Makabili nga ng isang phone pa para sa Dubai time!

Pass the tissue please

2006-08-18T22:32:00.001-07:00

Oh its good to cry again.

Hey Im not talking about crying over heartaches! I was crying over a very good movie, The Notebook. Its a very good movie about true love. The movie was about two people who fell in love amidst the distance and their status differences. The parents of the rich girl were really not in favor of the guy who actually makes only 40 cents an hour. They were separated as the girl went to New York to study. The girl fell in love with an equally rich guy believing that her first love has already forgotten their relationship and the promises they made.. For about a year the guy wrote to the girl every single day. Thats 365 letters can you imagine! But the letters never reached the girl for the mother didnt allow them to have any communication. Just as when the girl was about to marry, their paths crossed again. They realized that their love was as strong as anything that can come between them. They have survived the trial, the distance and the pains.

Youve just got to see the end of the movie. It really broke my heart. I just hope mine could end just like that. But only God knows. For about 2 months of being worlds apart, Ive been missing my honey every single day of my life. I just wish we could be together. But I know someday, we will survive the distance. I know someday, we will be together again.
Please pass the tissue. Sniff.

Saddest Moment of My Life

2006-07-05T01:46:00.000-07:00

I am just feeling down at this moment of my life. Only God knows how hurt I am right now.

Ill write again once Im healed emotionally. :P

The Last Time

2006-06-24T22:51:00.000-07:00

The first time I fell in love was long ago.
I didn't know how to give my love at all.
The next time I settled for what felt so close.
But without romance, you're never gonna fall.
After everything I've learned;
Now it's finally my turn.
This is the last time I'll fall... in love.
The first time we walked under that starry sky,
there was a moment when everything was clear.
I didn't need to ask or even wonder why, because each question is answered when your near.
and I'm wise enough to know when a miracle unfolds, this is the last time i'll fall in love.
Now don't hold back, just let me know.
Could I be moving much too fast or way too slow.
'Cause all of my life, I've waited for this day.
To find that once in a lifetime, this is it, I'll never be the same.
You'll never know what it's taken me to say these words.
And now that I've said them, they could never be enough.
As far as I can see, there's only you and only me.

This is the last time I'll fall in love.
Last time i'll fall in love.
The last time i'll fall... in love.

Post It - June 24

2006-06-23T17:40:00.000-07:00

I will be celebrating my 23rd year here on Earth. Looking back, so many things have happened in my life. There have been many down times as well as the good times. But so far amongst those things, the best thing is happening right now. Yeah it really is the best thing next to finding the man I will spend the rest of my life with (yes Ive found him finally!!!) Though I cant spill it yet, you will know it soon. But I have no regrets or whatever... Im just ecstatic as Ive never ever been.

As you read this. Please do pray for me. I need it. Just one little prayer will do. If not asking too much from you.

Keep posted. =) Youll miss the biggest surprise of your life.

Blog Quiz

2006-04-26T17:07:00.000-07:00

Results of your
Romantic Attachment Quiz

Based upon your answers, it appears that you tend to be more closed and to withhold your feelings in relationships with others. This is not necessarily a problem. But if you are having difficulties, they will most likely be in these areas:

Your partner may complain that you don't let them in, that you don't feel emotionally available
You may find that relationships may start out fine but deteriorate because you won't take the risks necessary to deepen the relationship
You may have trouble making long-term commitments that require intimacy

Any distress this behavior may cause you depends on how strongly you opt for avoidance rather than anxiety. Avoidance, after all, is healthy and necessary to maintain your autonomy, self esteem and safety. Its may be good to avoid possible partners when your instincts tell you that they are dangerous.

There is also a self-balancing system involved in any relationship. The person who avoids the risks of intimacy, for instance, may be able to learn about the joys of intimacy from the anxious person who worries about losing the relationship. Similarly the anxious person may benefit from appreciating the avoidant person's naturally well-developed sense of autonomy.

Your romantic attachment style: Fearful and Shy

You have described yourself as fearfully attached. This suggests that compared to others, you may be a little introverted and find it hard to speak up for yourself.

You probably find it a little difficult to become romantically involved because of your concern about getting out there and the possibility of getting hurt. You're likely experience shyness a bit more strongly than others do, and that helps make you stick close to home. You may feel less self confident than other people.

For some people who are a bit fearful, this is just fine. However, for others, this orientation can be a problem. If you feel you are fearful in your romantic involvements, but would like to become less so, you may find that you will benefit from assertiveness training. This is a form of training in which you are gradually challenged to stick up for yourself more, to become more active in going after what you want in life, in all domains. The challenge is gradual to avoid turning off the training before it can help you. And the rewards are strong.

Remember that attachment styles exist in degrees, and in this test, the degree to which a style is true for you will make a difference in your interpretation. Everyone has to have some style or another, and the features of any one style only become maladaptive when they exist in the extreme.

Take the exam here.

Dear Me

2006-04-22T15:35:00.000-07:00

Haller, how are you? Just wanted to take a reality check on you.... Hmm... buhay ka pa jan? Hehe. Life has been a tough one for you. Three years of trying to mend your heart.. thats quite long.. err mali.. ang tagal nun! =) I know its been hard. Youve spent nights of endless crying.. kaya nga nagkaganyan mata mo.. para ka nang eyebags na tinubuan ng mukha.. san ka pa?! ^^ Ilang moments yung napapatulala ka na lang sa isang tabi at maalala mo ang inyong mga sandali.

"Namulat ako at ngayo'y nag-iisa...Pagkatapos ng ulan...Bagama't nakalipas na ang mga sandali... Ay nagmumuni kung ako'y nagwagi...Pinipilit mang sabihin na ito'y wala sa akin...Ngunit bakit hanggang ngayon, nagdurugo pa rin.... Sa kanya pa rin babalik sigaw, ng damdamin...Sa kanya pa rin sasaya, bulong ng puso ko..Kung buhay pa ang alaala ng ating nakaraan...Ang pagmamahal at panahon alay pa rin sa kanya.... "

Kumanta na naman si Juriz. Naalala mo nun.. kapag tinutugtog yan.. you cant help but cry and feel bitter. Hmm sa kanya nga ba pa ren? Grabeh yung feeling noh.. yung kahit san ka magpunta.. sa malls.. sa church.. sa street nyo... kahit nga sa bahay molang.. nakikita mo sha... nafifeel mo ang presence nya.... at nasasaktan ka. How many birthdays na sa side ng relatives nya ang pinalampas mo kasi you dont want to see him. Last time na you visited their place... andun den ung wife nya.. dibah nagsikip dibdib mo. Funny nga because when she arrived, all the people there became quiet.. parang they felt the tension and alam nila na nasasaktan kayo pareho. Nakaka- miss si Angel no yung pamangkin niya na lage sinasabe ... "Tita Marielle sana kayo na lang ni Uncle nagasawa.. Tita Marielle mahal ka pa rin ni Uncle..." hayyzz...

But past is past. Debah we shouldnt linger too much about the past. We should learn from it. We live for the present and look forward for the future that lies ahead.

You've spent too much time crying sa past mo. Its time na I move on. Kaya now, this is my song for you:

Used to be that I believed in something
Used to be that I believed in love
It's been a long time since I've had that feeling
I could love someone
I could trust someone
I said I'd never let nobody near my heart again darlin'
I said I'd never let nobody in

But if you asked me to
I just might change my mind
And let you in my life forever
If you asked me to
I just might give my heart
And stay here in your arms forever
If you asked me to
If you asked me to

Somehow ever since I've been around you
Can't go back to being on my own
Can't help feeling darling since I've found you
That I've found my home
That I'm finally home
I said I'd never let nobody get too close to me darling
I said I needed, needed to be free

(But if you asked me to)

Asked me to, I will give my world to you baby
I need you now
Ask me to and I'll do anything for you baby, for you baby

If you asked me to
I'd let you in my life forever
If you asked me to

Yes you read it right. Thats my song for you because I think you are ready to start a new chapter in your life right now. I just wish you wont make that mistake again. I hope and pray you have found the right one. Listen to your heart this time. Youve come a long way and you deserve to be happy.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Happy and B-u-s-o-g!

Last night we had dinner at the best Sisig Place in Pasig, the Aysees (just beside Cityland Village). We are supposed to meet at the office para sasabay ako sa kanila eh alam nyo naman kabagal ko kumilos debah... so ayun usapan na 6pm nasa office na.. paalis pa lang ako ng house nun 6 hehe. So I was already in MRT when Sir Tj called me up. I should take the cab na lang daw from Ortigas. So I freaked out. Im not used to taking cabs in that area. Bute na lang the driver of the cab I had was not an abusadong taxi driver ehehe. Scary. Nakakaparanoid kasi yung mga driver na mukhang holdaper hehe. Saya nga kwentuhan kame nung manong. Muntik ko na makwento buong buhay ko.. bute na lang malapit lang ung Aysees from MRT Ortigas.

So I arrived there. Nakahinga ako maluwag. Bute naman di mahirap hanapin... hindi n ako mamromroblema. Ekkkkkkkk! Huhuhuh. Akala ko wala na problema.... Yun pala meron pa. Tagal nilang dumating. I was waiting for 30 mins! Yung boy dun sama na ng tingin sakin... iniisip p ata na gawin akong sisig. Hayyy... checking on the clock every now and then. Sa wakas dumating sila! Yipee!!!!

The best sisig experience! Panget lang dito ung napaso ako huhuhuh. Katakawan ko kumaen ayun napaso ako sa sizzling plate ang saket. Nonetheless its an experience not to be missed.... Yummy! See photos below:

Im the "Ice Bucket Girl" for the night - serbidora ng ice in short! Hehe.

With Mommy Lel na babambohin ka. Di kame mahilig sa pics. =)

Lovely girls on the floor. Sige umangal gulpe!

Ganda namen. Hehe.

Paalis na. Katabaan no! =)

Last shot!

I wanna ride that bus..

2006-04-18T16:53:00.000-07:00

Lifted from email.

You know, love is just like someone waiting for a bus.

When the bus comes, you look at it and you say to yourself "No.... so full....cannot sit down. I'll wait for the next one".

So you let the bus go and waited for the second bus.

Then the second bus came, you looked at it you say,"No...this bus is so old ...so shabby!"

So you let the bus go and again, decided to wait for the next bus.

After a while another bus came, it's not crowded, not old but you said, "No... not air-conditioned ...better wait for the next one".

So again you let the bus go and decided to wait for the next bus.

Then the sky started to get dark as it is getting late.

You panicked and jumped immediately inside the next bus. It is not until much later that you found out that you had boarded the wrong bus! So you wasted your time and money waiting for what you want! Even if an air-conditioned bus comes, you can't ensure that the air-conditioned bus won't break down or whether or not the airconditioner will be too cold for you.

So people... wanting to get what you want is not wrong. But it wouldn't hurt to give other person a chance, right? If you find that the "bus" doesn't suit you just press the red button and get off the bus! (as simple as that!)

Hey who said life is fair??? The best thing to do is be observant and open while you scrutinize the bus. If it doesn't suit you, get off.

But you must always have an extra something which you could use for the next bus that comes...
But wait........

I'm sure you have this experience before...

You saw a bus coming (the bus you want, of course) you flagged it but the driver acted as if he did not see you and zoomed pass you! It just wasn't meant for you!

The bottom line is, being loved is like waiting for a bus you want. Getting on the bus and appreciating the bus by giving it a chance depends totally on you. If you haven't made any choice, WALK!

Walking is like being out of love.

The good side of it is you can still choose any bus you want... the rest who couldn't afford another ride would just have to be content with the bus they rode on, ugly or not.

One more thing.... sometimes its better to choose a bus you are already familiar with rather than gamble with a bus that is unfamiliar to you. But then again, life wouldn't be complete without the risks involved.

BUT THERE'S ONE BUS THAT I FORGOT TO TELL YOU ABOUT - THE BUS THAT YOU DON'T HAVE TO WAIT FOR ...

IT WILL JUST STOP ON ITS OWN AND WILL ASK YOU TO COME INSIDE AND TAKE A FREE RIDE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE...

You Never Lose By Loving .... You Always Lose By Holding Back…

==================

BAKIT TAYO NAGMAMAHAL?!

why do we love ba?
so we can have somebody to talk to?
someone who can be there pag gusto natin gumala?

a person na pwedeng manlibre satin?
taong magbibitbit ng gamit mo?

ALALAY for short!

eh pano kung di ka nya mahal?
would you still love him/her?
would you still continue to care for that person?

bakit naman hinde?

you didnt love that person para magkaroon ka ng alalay,
magkaroon ka ng instant meal dahil libre,
taong gagawa ng assignments mo or projects,
or taong mahihila mo if you want to go out...

if thats what you think about love well sorry
ang BABAW mo!

loving a person doesn't need to have a criteria na dapat maganda o guwapo,
dapat mabait or understanding,
kasi once you fall inlove you take the risk of accepting dat person
kahit maingay sya matulog, yung hilik ng hilik
kahit matakaw sya o sobrang fat na hindi kayo kasya pag puno ang jeep!
kahit sobrang moody nya na kulang nalang ay sapakin mo sa inis!
yung sobrang selosa/seloso na pati barkada pinagseselosan..
badtrip diba?
and yung napaka-arte OA kung baga!
o kahit ano pang things
that would turn you off...

hirap tlaga magmahal trying to be PERFECT kase gusto mong magtagal
pero hindi yun ang sagot sa lahat...

ACCEPTING the real person fully

kase if you said na mahal mo sya you dont need to find answers
kung bakit mo sya mahal...
kase lahat ng tao nagbabago but if you accept that person
magbago man sya in the middle of your relationship
hindi ka masasaktan kase you know that darating din yun..
tsaka tanggap mo sya ng buo...

mahirap gawin pero masarap subukan dahil
wala ng sasaya pa if you let one person feel na
MAHAL NA MAHAL mo sya without asking 4 anything return...

then you can say wow un pla ang

LOVE!

One Sleepy Day in the Office

2006-04-17T11:15:00.000-07:00

spell your name backward
> elleiram

story behind your first name:
> walang story name ko eh....

when’s your birthday:
> June 28, 1983

where do you live:
> QC

DESCRIBE YOUR:

wallet:
- black - mom gave it to me just last weeek... my first matino wallet heheh

your eyes
- brown.. sabi nila...

toothbrush:
- white and purple

jewelry worn daily:
- never without earings.... and my pink watch.

cell phone:
- Sony Ericsson

pillow cover right now:
- waaa i dont know... ill check tonight.. im too sleepy to appreciate my sheets...

car:
- have no car yet. care to buy me one?

bedroom:
- riot...

sunglasses:
- di ako nagsu-sunglass eh.. still conemplating on buying one...

shampoo:
- i seldom shampoo.. i use conditioner...now im using palmolive hehe.. bango eh

cologne and/or perfume:
- Be Delicious

CD in stereo right now:
- no cds.. only mp3s hehehe

piercings:
- ears ... two piercing on each...

what you are wearing now?
- shirt, pants and rubber shoes

what will you do after this?
- kakaen... 130 pa lunch ko ... =)

if you could get away with it and murder anyone who would it be:
- i have a list.. wait ill read it aloud..

person and/or people you wish you could see right now.
- secret....

some of your favorite movies:
- serendipity......

something you’re looking forward to in the coming week:
- inuman! ^_^

something you just ate:
- kakafinish ko lang ng hash brown weeeee.. need to diet na pala huhuh

something you are deathly afraid of:
- what lies beyond....

do you like candles:
- nyak! nope.....

do you like bars:
- bars?? which one? bka kulungan yan.. chocolate bars... ay nako d na tinatanong yan!

do you like the taste of blood:
- waaa kadiri!!!!

do you believe in love:
- yes. i believe ill find the real one someday!

do you believe in love at first sight:
- NO way!

Are you in love?
- errr... i think so.. confused ako eh....

do you believe in heaven:
- yes

do you believe in God:
- yes

Do you have a tattoo?
- none. used to have henna...

can you eat with chopsticks:
- kapag di gutom ok lang .. pero kapag im dead hungry.. spoon and fork nga waiter!!!!! =)

what are some of your favorite candies:
- POLO and mentos

Favorite Soda:
- im not into soda.. iced tea ako...

what’s something you wish you could understand better:
- is there someone meant for me?

If you could turn back time, what would you change?
- no regrets.. mistakes are life's little gems... they'll make u shine in the end...

If given a million dollars what’s one thing you would buy?
- hm.. foooooood! ^^

Can you cook?
- yes.

are you shy around your crush:
- haha. uu. ill be impossibly quiet kapag katabi ko un.

=============

boring sa office... inaantok ako... -_-

Currently watching this video....

2006-04-11T17:31:00.000-07:00

Hmmm.. I thought I'd only be watching.... sniff sniff...... Pakshet tlaga. ^__^

And then I saw it.....

2006-04-10T09:18:00.000-07:00

Yeah. You''ll never know who this baby is.. and please DONT dare ask me.

(a big grin..... )

Yes I still bleed...

2006-04-01T18:41:00.000-08:00

Have you ever had that feeling that you thought you’re okay but then when reality strikes you, you wake up still bleeding? Have you ever pretended to be happy to cover up all the pain you feel? That’s exactly how I feel. After 2 long years of being broken, I still choose to shatter myself into pieces than to move on. Alam ko na I need to move on, but my heart tells the opposite. Im so tired and so sick feeling this pain. Kung meron lang sana gamot na pwede ko inumin para mamanhid na ang nararamdaman ko ginawa ko na and maybe I would overdose myself pa. It’s a curse na paulit ulit na lang. Kaya now Im so scared of loving again. Ive been with two rebound relationships and believe me, it was the hardest thing to do. The hardest for me was to end a relationship because I no longer know where the relationship is heading to. I am still holding on to the past kaya I cant make the most out of the relationships Ive been to. I just wish I would find the “ONE”. Napapagod na din ako. =)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Share ko lang itong song:

All Behind Us Now

Hey, I'm so sorry
that it didn't work the way
that we'd always planned
Hey, I'm so sorry
that you went away
and somehow didn't understand

We pretended for so many years, but now
its time wash away my tears

CHORUS

Cause/And it's all behind us now
cause we've learned to live somehow without
each other
And its easy to see, it ain't never
gonna be the same again

And its all behind us now
cause we found a way to live without
each other
And in time we'll have to see
If its ever gonna be that way again
ohh......

...
Hey, I'm so sorry
that I couldn't find the words
that might have made you stay
and hey, it's so funny
how we both can say the same thing in a
different way

...
We pretended for so many years,
but now its over baby
and so are my tears

repeat chorus

...
I was holdin' out for far too long
But now I finally found where I belong

repeat chorus to fade...

RIDDLE: Why is HONEY golden in color?

2006-03-12T11:57:00.000-08:00

A) Because of the Sun the flowers receive?
B) Because Flower Pollen is naturally Golden?
C) Because it's manufactured that way?
D) I don't know.

The answer may be found below.

A little lower...

Just a little lower now...

THE RIGHT ONE

2006-03-12T10:56:00.000-08:00

lifted from pinoyexchange.com

Somebody once told me that : "Finding the right person is very hard and very wrong...it is best to be the right person for the one you love and start from there... you'll always end up disappointed when you set standards and define a "right person" for you... and don't rush things coz somewhere somehow God is preparing somebody for you."

Don't be in a hurry to get into a relationship because you can never find love if you insist that you are already into it. Try to find time to really understand your real feelings, to know who you really are, and what you really want in a relationship. You're right, there's no such thing as a perfect relationship, but there's a compatible partnership that goes along with it. If you already knew that you're too big to fit into a small sized t-shirt, don't give it a try. You'll probably break it and pay for the damages you have made.

If you knew and felt that the relationship will not last, don't go deeper into it. You'll just suffer the consequences and live like hell for the rest of your life. It's really hard to say goodbye though, but you can't make it any better by just pretending you still have the same feelings. Try to let go and give yourself a chance to live life to the fullest.

Give yourself a chance to grow and give your heart a much needed attention. Then you will find that you have made the right decision and you made it all by yourself. We call it love when we can't leave someone and see them crying as we try to let go. We are wrong, it's just pity. We call it love when we're too attached and think that losing the one we love will somehow make us weak and unable to face the storms of life. We misunderstood, its just that we're too much dependent to them.

We call it love when we give our whole life to them, the wholeness of us and imagined that if they leave, no one would accept us and our past. We are mistaken, its just insecurity. But no matter what the definition is, the truth still remains that love isn't something you can buy or beg.

It is real and existing.

You can't touch it but you can feel it in your heart.

You can't find it, but it will knock before you when you least expect it to come.

It can make you the happiest soul in heaven, but don't forget that it can also make you the most miserable person in the whole galaxy.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Quotes to live by:
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

gnO ka kspeciaL?
ganito...
ngLLakad ka,
bglng my
sumbg s
mkha mo..
pgmLat mO,
La kna mkta..
sbi ng dkt2r,
buLg kn daw...
aftr 3wks...
nkkKta kn...
ako...?
d na..

what if the person you secretly love tells you
that he already found the one he wants to spend forever with
would you be brave enough to ask who it is
or just bear the pain not knowing it's you after all???

this night,
i wish you might take a look at the stars above you.
one of them shall slowly fade and still you might never know.
Sa milyong bituing nakikita mo,
ano nga naman sayo kung mawala ako?..

Tickle's My Personal Test Results

2006-02-20T19:17:00.000-08:00

I took all these tests one boring day. Suffice to know some of these absolutely described my personality. Take a peek:

1. The Original Inkblot Test

Your subconscious mind is driven most by Curiosity.

You are full of questions about life, people, and your own potential. You spend more time than others imagining the possibilities for your life — and you're open to things others are too afraid to consider.

You have an almost physical need to know and do more. It's only through new experiences that you feel a greater understanding of yourself and the world. You also have a rebellious streak that shows up when you feel unable to truly influence the world or circumstances around you. Your appetite for novel experiences also shows an openness others don't have, but wish they did.

Your psyche is very rich; the more you learn about it, the more you will understand who you really are.

Take the Inkblot Test here.

2. Do You Follow Your Heart or Your Head?

Marielle, you follow your head when it comes to romance.

Maybe you've been burned before, or maybe you're just too busy changing the world, but when it comes to your love life, you definitely look before you leap. While you might not be cautious in every aspect of your life, love is an area you tread on lightly. Let's face it, you'd rather have a little more control over your emotions, but they're sometimes hard to pin down. So rather than get lost in them, you, and many of us, probably prefer to focus on other aspects of your life.

It's not that you don't want love to wash over you so you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. It's just that you'd probably like to fall in love when it best fits into your calendar. Still, with your smarts, you're probably able to sense when you're up for a little romancing and when you're not. Just remember, if you're ever on the fence, you want to fall off on the side where someone's going to catch you. Especially if he's tall, dark, and handsome.

Take the Heart or Head Test here.

3. What is your signature color?

Marielle, your signature color is Sterling Blue.

You've got a good head on your shoulders and you're not afraid to use it. Serious, intellectual types like you meet their match with a cool color that sparkles with the same striking intelligence as you do. That's why Sterling Blue is the ideal match for you! This is not to say that you've always got your head in a book. Not by any stretch. While you may not be the person at the party kicking off the karaoke, you're probably the one starting up stimulating conversations and making your cohorts chuckle with your quick wit. You're likely to have an insatiable curiosity that's catchy, and friends who know that you are a great person to turn to when they need a logical head to help them sort through their problems. So keep it up with your sterling hue of blue. You probably have a way of keeping things deep that people truly appreciate.

What's Your Signature Color?

4. The Zodiac Match Test

Marielle, the best Zodiac Match for your personality is Leo

Leo, the Lion (July 23 to August 22): This generous and faithful partner is just your type. Initially, a Leo may catch your eye with their outgoing ways and flamboyant personal presence. But as you get to know them, you're even more likely to be drawn to your Leo's strength and loyalty. Be aware, people born under this sign are known for seeking pleasure at every turn. Typically, they aren't afraid to take risks to get what they want. This can-do, forceful nature can make Leos seem a bit domineering at times. However, a Leo partner will also usually be very willing to work through any problems that arise between the two of you. In the bedroom, you'll likely find the Lion to be a romantic lover with an ample sex drive. This is just another aspect of their love for life, attention, and fun.

Although Leo is your strongest Zodiac Match, your responses indicate there are a number of other astrological signs that you're highly compatible with.

What is your zodiac match?

5. Your Subconscious Self: What's Really on Your Mind?

Marielle, your subconscious mind is most preoccupied with issues around your love life

On a conscious level, you might already be aware that something is troubling you, or eating up a lot of time when it comes to your love life. But it's also possible that thoughts and feelings about your romantic life have been preoccupying your subconscious mind — leaving you with nothing more than a general sense that things just don't feel 100% right in your life though you can't quite figure out why.

You may feel your love life is unfulfilling and needs a jumpstart. You might be going through a lot of changes in your love life that you find emotionally draining. You might simply spend a lot of time thinking about romantic relationships. Or maybe you're so frustrated with your situation that you avoid the topic all together.

Whichever feelings hold true, your test results indicate that right now, your subconscious mind is working overtime to resolve the issues confronting you in this area of your life — even if you don't feel aware of it.

However, you can learn easy ways to tap into your subconscious mind and discover the source of the issues that are preoccupying you.

What's Really on Your Mind?

6. The Ancient Tarot: What's in the cards for your future?

Marielle, we'll start with the second card you picked, The Star.

This card symbolizes hope and possibility. You are currently experiencing a moment when your greatest wish will come true. There is a great love, given and received, that is illuminating the meaning of your life. Getting this card in this position may be a sign of great...

What does your handwriting say about you?

2006-02-12T15:25:00.000-08:00

Take this quiz and find out for yourself.

---------
My handwriting:

The results of your analysis say:

You like to be surrounded by four solid walls.

- Hmmm. I actually hate the idea of being trapped inside a closed area. I prefer carefree living,without restrictions and the like.

You are a social person who likes to talk and meet others.

- Absolutely true! I like meeting a lot of people!

You are affectionate, passionate, expressive, and future-oriented.

- Another truth to this! I like showing affection to everybody -- and they can feel the sincerity that goes with it.

You are a talkative person, maybe even a busybody!

- Show me the evidence that I am a talkative person!!! Show me right now! ^^

You enjoy life in your own way and do not depend on the opinions of others.

- True. One of the principles I live by is not to mind other people's opinion toooo much. I act the way i really am and I dont give a damn to whatever other people say about me. This is me.. they have to accept who I am or else, they will have to stay away from me. (Yeah Im mean! Tada! Hahaha!)

---------
What this is all about:

Individuals use personality testing in the interest of self-improvement, to gain a better understanding of their selves. Employers use personality testing to find qualified personnel. Psychologists use testing for personality evaluation and therapy.

Handwriting analysis is a method of identifying, evaluating, and understanding a person's personality through the patterns revealed by his handwriting. Whether you mind your "p"s and "q"s and dot your "i" and cross your "t"s can say a lot about how you think and behave.

The scientific validity behind it is debatable, but handwriting analysis is still often been used as a means to determining a person's nature and personality traits.

Still cant believe it? Try it and see if it works for you. Here is the link for you. Have fun!

First Love

2006-02-07T18:31:00.000-08:00

I loved this song the moment I heard it. Try listening to the song 
and see the translation below. Truly heart breaking!

First Love
Utada Hikaru

our last kiss
tasted like tobacco
a bitter and sad smell

tomorrow, at this time
where will you be?
who will you be thinking about?

you are always gonna be my love
even if I fall in love with someone once again
I'll remember to love
you taught me how
you are always gonna be the one
it's still a sad song
until I can sing a new song

the paused time is
about to start moving
there's many things that I don't want to forget about

tomorrow, at this time
I will probably be crying
I will probably be thinking about you

you will always be inside my heart
you will always have your own place
I hope that I have a place in your heart too
now and forever you are still the one
it's still a sad song
until I can sing a new song

you are always gonna be my love
even if I fall in love with someone once again
I'll remember to love
you taught me how
you are always gonna be the one
it's still a sad song
until I can sing a new song

Question and Answer Portion

2006-02-05T16:35:00.000-08:00

1. what kind of first impression do you think people say when they first see you?
- masungit ... suplada... ironically some thinks im an approachable person when they first see me ...

2. what's one thing you like to do alone?
- reminisce about past things....

3. what is your favorite line to say when you're drunk?
- hindi ako iiyak! hindi ako susuka! ^^

4. how many drinks do u need before u get tipsy?
- sa San Mig Light mga 3 bottles wala na ako... sa Red Horse naku 3 tagay wala na ako.. i can tolerate hard drinks better than beer..

6. what kind of books do you like to read?
- depends... ugh. i only read recommended books pala

7. do you think you're cute?
- cute is an appropriate adjective for puppies...

8. do you have a problem changing clothes in front of your friends?
- uu naman! my friends are gays .. este guys!

9. what do you eat when you raid the fridge at night?
- ice cream!!!

10. describe your bed?
- hmmm.. theres only one way to describe mg bed.. MAGULO! ^^ kidding aside... my bed lets me sleep.. its like paghiga ko.. ull find me snoring in a few seconds....

11. spontaneous or planned?
- i plan everything but somethimes it ends up in a riot.. kaya sometimes spontaneity may do good...

12. do you know how to play poker?
- no.

13. what do you carry with you at all times?
- phone. cant live without it at the moment. baka kasi mawala ako. i need someone to contact just in case har har har.

14. what do you miss most about being a kid?
- i miss playing without getting tired easily. once u age.. parang pagod k agad!amf!

15. are you happy with your given name?
- hmmm... hahaha *grin* do I need to answer this??

16. what color is your bedroom?
- errr white, though id like to paint it purple... hindi pede eh. huhuhhu!

17. have you ever been in a play?
- yes. high school days. nung di pa ako marunong mahiya!

18. do you like yourself and believe in yourself?
- of course. if i dont, who else db?

19. do you consider yourself to be a nice person?
- depends. im good if you do the same. if your bad.. im worse!!!!

20. do you spend more time with your girlfriend/boyfriend or your friends?
- errr... work!

21. what's one thing you wish you could do but can't?
- ride the Space Shuttle .... grrh!!

22. what is your ideal wedding location?
- Church!!! Not sure which one yet! Ipon muna!

23. whats one instrument you wish you could play?
- guitar and im studying it. have my own guitar already! Yipeee!!

24. whats one language you want to learn?
- German! I studied it once in High School days.. pero nagsawa din me.. Id also like to study Mandarin.. chung kwayla yaaaaaai sashikibuta. *grins*

25. have you ever pierced your body parts?
- i loveeeeeeeee ear piercing! ehehhe.

26. do you have any tattoos?
- never!

27. what's one trait you hate in a person?
- superficial people!!!!

28. do you consider yourself materialistic?
- sometimes! Im only human!

29. what do you cook best?
- err.. mom doesnt let me cook at home.... baka masayang eh ^^. BTw.. why do i need to cook .. mom is the bestttttt cook in the world.

30.favorite person/s to talk with on the phone?
- i hate the phone! Depends pala ehhehe.

Sentiments...

2006-01-23T21:28:00.000-08:00

The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.

----------

Wala lang. Sabog ako. Next time Ill share. ^^

Laugh Out Loud

2006-01-22T16:37:00.000-08:00

eto story ng mga kababayan natin sa spain ksi minsan nagkukwentuhan din sila about their bloopers...yung isang pinoy nagtatrabaho sya sa bahay...nandun din yung amo nya at pinapaluto sya...conversation nila:

amo: i want u to cook this beef di plantsa...(word n spanish,grill yata ang meaning)

pinoy: si senor...
after 10 minutes pumasok ang amo sa kitchen nakita nya ang pinoy pinaplantsa yung karne as in plantsa....napanganga na lang daw amo nya
maid story:

me: ate, pakikuha nga yung pantalon ko nakasampay sa likod
maid: bukas na lang ati, madilim sa lekod i
me: buksan mo nlang yung ilaw
maid: naku ati pundido kasi i, hindi ko maboksan yung elaw
me: dali na kasi, papalantsahin pa yun eh. i-try mo lang i-switch uli, malay mo sumindi
maid: sigi (pinindot yung switch, UMILAW) aba! it's a mirakol!
We had a maid who always thought that all white L300 vans are that of my dad so everytime na galing sila ng palengke ng nanay ko, and makakita siya ng van after palengke, natataranta pa sha na nagsasabi sa mom ko, na andun na ung dad ko at sinusundo sila, with matching habol pa to the car, heheheh

another time naman, with the same maid, i asked her to get me a pillow from my room kasi ung sofa namin kahoy and i'm soo tamad to go upstairs and get it mysef... nasabi ko ata, "andun sa kama" un pala nde nya naintindhan, so i was wondering bakit antagal tagal nya sa kwarto ko so i decided to just go up and get it myself, and lo and behold, i saw her moving my whole bed kasi akala pala nya na i wanted her to bring me the whole bed downstairs sa sala, comedy!!! poor thing and this really happened, no exaggeration
This happened to my friends bro:

Maid is cleaning Bro's room. Bro enters wearing only a towel (kakaligo lang). Maid starts to walk out of room.

Bro: Neng, isara mo ang pinto.

Maid turns around with tears in her eyes.

Maid: Kuya, h'wag po!!!

Bro: Gagah! Paglabas mo ng kwarto!!!
bumili yung amo ng chalk na insecticide...

amo: inday, eto gamitin mo pampatay ng ipis.
helper: opo

next day, nakita ng amo sa dingding...

"epis, mamatay ka na!!!"
Minsan, namalengke si mama at yung katulong...
Mama: Ofel, iligpit mo na yung mga pinamili natin
Ofel: Opo.
Mama: Bilisan mo at marami pa tayong lulutuin
Ofel: Ate, saan po ilalagay to, sa altar?
Mama: Ano ba yon?
Ofel: Ito po Ate.

She was holding a cauliflower.
One time, my brother asked our maid, Delia, to prepare hot calamansi juice for him, bec. he wasnt feeling very well.

Brother: Delia, gawa mo naman ako ng hot calamansi.

after a few minutes, Delia came back with a platito w/ 4 pieces of calamansi..na mukhang squishy na.

Brother: ano to??

Delia: Kuya, eto yung hot calamansi.

Bwahahaha..yun pala , she fried the calamansi sa oil!! Hot nga naman, no??
pag may ayaw kameng kausapin sa phone or ayaw naming labasin yung pumunta, we ask our maid to say na umalis...minsan naman tulog...
eh, minsan, harassed na harassed na siya because my mom was barking orders left and right nang mag ring yung phone namin, she answers in a jiffy...
maid: hillow?! (mejo pasigaw na irita ah)
caller: pwedeng makausap si .....
maid: Ay!Naku! wala-umalis-tulog!

abaw!
yung tita ko sa States, may Filipina maid, yaya na rin siya ng mga cousins ko...one time yung cousin ko (he was about 5 or 6 then) nagpapaalam sa mom niya kasi birthday daw ni MACHO, a classmate...

so ok naman, pinayagan siya ng tita ko and my tita took him to MACHO's birthday party, hoping to meet his family na din. They arrived there, and she met the mom.. she goes "Oh hi, you must be MACHO's mom?" and the lady corrects them by saying "Oh yes I am!" then turns to my cousin, saying "MATTHEW and his friends are outside by the back!"

yun pala yung cousin ko nahawa sa yaya niya dun sa MACHO...
sabi ni mama: beng, paki tignan nga yung kanin na nakasalang.
Takbo naman si beng..aba at pagbalik nya, kinalabit niya si mama (with matching expressionless face at monotonous voice) sabay sabi, "Ate nasusunog na po yung kanin nyo." susmaryosep. patawarin ka sana ni mother
Ito naman ay isang magalang na katulong na dadaan sa gitna ng dalawang bisita:

"Eskiyus me to you plis! Ken ay pas hir in the medel agin en agin? Kasi si sir utos ng utos me to the back and to the forth?"

Tapos nagsalita pa ulit, "I will be hapi to retorn to eskiyus me to yu by and by."

Natulala yung dalawang bisita.
As usual yung alibi na wala sa bahay pag may iniiwasan na tawag:

Help: Hello?
Friend: Pwede kay badoods?
Help: Wala po siya dito, di pa dumadating.
Friend: Dali na, tawagin mo na alam kong nandyan siya e
(She was the one I was with before going home)
Help: Teka lang ha tatanungin ko lang siya kung wala siya dito.

----------

Sakit ng tiyan ko! Hehehe!

My True Confessions

2006-01-22T00:55:00.000-08:00

I'm afraid of the quiet:
- yeah i do! theres something mysterious (and very
troubling)

in a quiet person... seems like they hide a lot of
secrets....

scary! ^^

I have cut myself:
- not yet.. though i tried before hehe. kaya lang
when i think abt the pain.. i dont push thru ^^

I'm afraid of the dark:
- very afraid! hehe. i have a very imaginative
mind. =)

I'm afraid of facing my back to open doors at night:
- yeah sort off. bka may humipan sa batok
ko...weeeeeeee!

scary!!

I've run away from home:
- di ko magawa. hehe. hanggang isip lang. ^^

I shut others out when I'm sad:
- yup. ill be impossibly quiet when im sad. hehe.

I communicate with others easily:
- yup i do! daldal ko nga eh! kakausapin ko pader
den eh! ^^

I watch the news:
- dont know how to watch tv anymore. i go home
just to

sleep.

I own over 5 rap CDs:
- ugh. no. ^^

I own something from Hot Topic:
- whats that? ugh no again.

I love Disney movies:
- yep. it makes me nostalgic of my childhood days.

I am a sucker for eyes:
- im a sucker for lips. hehe.

I kill bugs:
- yes.

I curse regularly:
- waaaaaa. yeah i do. T_T

I have an "x" in my screen name:
- none

I've slipped out a "lol" in a real conversation:
- yay. i did!

I like Spam:
- spam as in the canned good? eheh. i do.

I bake well:
- i love to bake but have no time to do so at the
moment.

I have worn pajamas to class:
- not yet. but i did in the ofc. we had a weekly
costume party.

I have a job:
- a very interseting job. hehe.

I am in love with someone/like someone:
- kinda. hehe. next question pls. *blush*

I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS:
- HiNdi aH! d0 y0u hAvE aN eVideNce?!!! ^^

I like to laugh:
- i LOVE to laugh!

I have tried alcohol:
- yup. i did and still do!! weeee!

I have cough drops when I'm not sick:
- No way.

I have smoked weed:
- Never!

Swallowing pills make you gag:
- No.

I have many emotional scars:
- Nyay! Wala po.

I have many physical scars:
- Uu. Hehe.

I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room!:
- Hindi naman. Dependa kung gaano KALAKi yung
spider hehe.

I am really ticklish:
- ay oo! Lalo na sa legs!! waaaaaaaag po!!!!!

I love chocolate:
- i really do!!!!!!

I bite my nails:
- nope.

I am comfortable being me:
- uu naman! di ako orocan.

Seen a shooting star:
- hmmm. technically not yet.. bka imagination ko
lang ung

nakita ko.

Laughed and had some type of beverage come out of
your

nose:
- ay madalas! bungisngis ako eh.

Swore at your parents:
- patalikod eheheh.

Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour:
- nyay. d pa naman.

Drank a half a gallon of milk in under a minute:
- no.

Bitten someone:
- yes! a lot of times!!

Gotten the chicken pox:
- yes

Crashed into a car:
- not yet. wag naman sana.

Ridden in a taxi:
- uu naman!

Had feelings for someone who didn't like you back:
- shmpre. madalas pa nga db.

Had a crush on a teacher/coach:
- yah i did!

Been On A Plane:
- not yet!

Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show:
- nyay anu yun.

Thrown up in a bar:
- Waaaaa! Lage nyahahaha!

Eaten Sushi:
- Yup! Love ko shusi! ay sushi pla!

Walked purposefully into traffic with your eyes
closed:
- no noh! d pa ako baliw.

I tried to kill myself:
- never! not desperate pa!!!!

----------
Another tagalog survey:

1. masasabi mo bang kumpleto na ang buhay mo ngayon?
-- hindi pa. marami pa akong pangarap sa buhay eh.

2. bakit?
-- nasagot ko na ang iyong katanungan.

3. masarap bang magmahal? bakit?
-- oo naman. ang magmahal ang pinakamakabuluhang

damdamin sa mundo.

4. nasaktan ka na ba?
-- oo. mdalas. hehe.

5. kung oo, ilang beses na at ano ang natutunan mo
dito?
-- madalas. natutunan ko (natutunan nga ba?? !!!)
na maglaan

ng pagmamahal para sa sarili ko.

6. may nasaktan ka na ba?
-- oo naman sa tingin ko.

7. anong ginagawa mo kapag nasasaktan ka?
-- kumakaen ako ng kumakaen.. yosi (pero itinigil
ko na ito) at

uminom (di ko pa tinitigil!) hehehe....

8. pano ka magselos?
-- sobrah ako magselos. Lahat pinagseselosan ko
ehehe!!!

9. pano pag pinagseselos ka ng mahal mo?
-- shempre selos to death den ako. Aww. Naranasan
ko na yong pinagseselos ako. Hayy. Nakakasawa den
hehe!

10. eh kung mas inuuna pa nya barkada nya?
-- Ay ganun! Hmmmm... uunahin ko den barkada ko
ehehehe.

11. Pano kung wala syang time para sayo?
-- sobrah na ha! ayoko na nun!! hehe.

12. pano naman kung sobra2 yung time n hinihingi
nya sayo?
-- hindi nya kelangan hingan ako. kapag mahal ko
di na hinihingi ang time.

13. anong gagawin mo kung gusto mo na makipagbreak?
-- yan ang hindi ko kaya sagutin hanggang ngayon.
kung pano makipaghiwalay!

14. sobra2 ka ba magmahal?
-- sobrah sobrah sobrah!

15. makikipagbalikan kba kung mahal mo pa?
-- depende. di ko pa nagagawa yan. kapag nasubukan
ko na hehe.

16. may minahal ka bang hanggang sa panaginip lng?
-- oo naman. meron hehe. lihim lang ha. nyahahaha.
(aw tagalog na tagalog talaga eheheh)

17. pano kung puro words lang sya?
-- mas gusto ko ginagawa kesa puro salita!!

18. mahal mo, mahal k, pero di kayo?
-- Hmmm. Walang komento ^^

19. kung sabihin nya sayong mhal ka nya kahit my
gf/bf sha?
-- kalokohan na yan!!!

20. may gf/bf ka tapos nainlove ka sa iba?
-- waaaaaaaaaaaaa. mahirap yan.

21. yung gf/bf mo, kinocontrol ka?
-- kapag mahal ko.. hahayaan ko sha kontrolin ako.

22. masarap rin bang maging single?
-- oo masaya den maging single. may panahon ka sa
sarili mo .. sa friends mo. me panahon ka maisip
yung sarili mong mundo.

23. pano pag may gf/bf ka pero madaming hadlang?
-- kung totoo ang pagmamahal.. ipinaglalaban!

24. sino mas paniniwalaan mo: gf/bf o bestfriend?
-- ang sarili ko muna!

25. mahilig ka bang magrevenge?
-- hmmm. madalas naiisip ko. pro takot ako sa
karma eh.

99 SECRETS GIRLS HAVE TO KNOW ABOUT GUYS

2006-01-04T19:34:00.000-08:00

1. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls.
2. Guys hate flirts.
3. A guy can like you for a minute, and then forget you afterwards.
4. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is.
5. "Are you doing something?" or "Have you eaten already?" are the first usual questions a guy asks on the phone just to get out from stammering.
6. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.
7. When a guy really likes you, he'll disregard all your bad characteristics.
8. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.
9. Guys will do anything just to get the girl's attention.
10. Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend.
11. When guys want to meet your parents. Let them.
12. Guys want to tell you many things but they can't. And they sure have one habit to gain courage and spirit to tell you many things and it is drinking!
13. Guys cry!!!
14. Don't provoke(irritate) the guy to heat up. Believe me. He will.
15. Guys can never dream and hope too much.
16. Guys usually try hard to get the girl who has dumped them, and this makes it harder for them to accept their defeat.
17. When you touch a guy's heart, there's no turning back.
18. Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?!..uh...never mind!" would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking.
19. Guys go crazy when girls touch their hands.
20. Guys are good flatterers when courting but they usually stammer when they talk to a girl they really like.
21. When a guy makes a prolonged "umm" or makes any excuses when you're asking him to do you a favor, he's actually saying that he doesn't like you and he can't lay down the card for you.
22. When a girl says "no", a guy hears it as "try again tomorrow."
23. You have to tell a guy what you really want before he gets the message clearly.
24. Guys hate gays!
25. Guys love their moms.
26. A guy would sacrifice his money for lunch just to get you a couple of roses.
27. A guy often thinks about the girl who likes him. But this doesn't mean that the guy likes her.
28 You can never understand him unless you listen to him.
29. If a guy tells you he loves you once in a lifetime. He does.
30. Beware. Guys can make gossips scatter through half of the face of the earth faster than girls can.
31. Like Eve, girls are guys' weaknesses.
32. Guys are very open about themselves.
33. It's good to test a guy first before you believe him. But don't let him wait that long.
34. No guy is bad when he is courting
35. Guys hate it when their clothes get dirty. Even a small dot.
36. Guys really admire girls that they like even if they're not that much pretty.
37. Your best friend, whom your boyfriend seeks help from about his problems with you may end up being admired by your boyfriend.
38. If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.
39. A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you.
40. A guy finds ways to keep you off from linking with someone else.
41. Guys love girls with brains more than girls in miniskirts.
42. Guys try to find the stuffed toy a girl wants but would unluckily get the wrong one.
43. Guys virtually brag about anything.
44. Guys cannot keep secrets that girls tell them.
45. Guys think too much.
46. Guys' fantasies are unlimited.
47. Girls' height doesn't really matter to a guy but her weight does!
48. Guys tend to get serious with their relationship and become too possessive. So watch out girls!!!
49. When a girl makes the boy suffer during courtship, it would be hard for him to let go of that girl.
50. It's not easy for a guy to let go of his girlfriend after they broke up especially when they've been together for 3 years or more.
51. You have to tell a guy what you really want before getting involved with that guy.
52. A guy has to experience rejection, because if he's too-good-never-been-busted, never been in love and hurt, he won't be matured and grow up.
53. When an unlikable circumstance comes, guys blame themselves a lot more than girls do. They could even hurt themselves physically.
54. Guys have strong passion to change but have weak will power.
55. Guys are tigers in their peer groups but become tamed pussycats with their girlfriends.
56. When a guy pretends to be calm, check if he's sweating. You'll probably see that he is nervous.
57. When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl. He really is.
58. When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying,"Please come and listen to me"
59. Guys don't really have final decisions.
60. When a guy loves you, you bring out the best in him.
61. If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him.
62. If a guy has been kept shut or silent, say something.
63. Guys believe that there's no such thing as love at first sight, but court the girls anyway and then realize at the end that he is wrong.
64. Guys like femininity not feebleness.
65. Guys don't like girls who punch harder than they do.
66. A guy may instantly know if the girl likes him but can never be sure unless the girl tells him.
67. A guy would waste his time over video games and basketball, the way a girl would do over her romance novels and make-ups.
68. Guys love girls who can cook or bake.
69. Guys like girls who are like their moms. No kidding!
70. A guy has more problems than you can see with your naked eyes.
71. A guy's friend knows everything about him. Use this to your advantage.
72. Don't be a snob. Guys may easily give up on the first sign of rejection.
73. Don't be biased. Try loving a guy without prejudice and you'll be surprised.
74. Girls who bathe in their eau de perfumes do more repelling than attracting guys.
75. Guys are more talkative than girls are especially when the topic is about girls.
76. Guys don't comprehend the statement "Get lost" too well.
77. Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions but still love them more.
78. When a guy gives a crooked or pretentious grin at your jokes, he finds them offending and he just tried to be polite.
79. Guys don't care about how shiny their shoes are unlike girls.
80. Guys tend to generalize about girls but once they get to know them,they'll realize they're wrong.
81. Any guy can handle his problems all by his own. He's just too stubborn to deal with it.
82. Guys find it so objectionable when a girl swears.
83. Guys' weakest point is at the knee.
84. When a problem arises, a guy usually keeps himself cool but is already thinking of a way out.
85. When a guy is conscious of his looks, it shows he is not good at fixing things.
86. When a guy looks at you, either he's amazed of you or he's criticizing you.
87. When you catch him cheating on you and he asks for a second chance, give it to him. But when you catch him again and he asks for another chance, ignore him.
88. If a guy lets you go, he really loves you.
89. If you have a boyfriend, and your boy best friend always glances at u and it obviously shows that he is jealous whenever you're with your boyfriend, all I can say is your boy best friend loves you more than your boyfriend does.
90. Guys learn from experience not from the romance books that girls read and take as their basis of experience.
91. You can tell if a guy is really hurt or in pain when he cries in front of you!
92. If a guy suddenly asks you for a date, ask him first why.
93. When a guy says he can't sleep if he doesn't hear your voice even just for one night, hang up. He also tells that to another girl. He only flatters you and sometimes makes fun of you.
94. You can truly say that a guy has good intentions if you see him praying sometimes.
95. Guys seek for advice not from a guy but from a girl.
96. Girls are allowed to touch boys' things. Not their hair!
97. If a guy says you're beautiful, that guy likes you.
98. Guys hate girls who overreact.
99. Guys love you more than you love them if they are serious in your relationships.

My type of guy

2006-01-04T18:23:00.000-08:00

From friendster:

1. older or younger? I prefer older... mga 2 years ang minimum! ^_^

2. tall or short? taller than me please.

3. thin or fat? tama lang! i dont want toooo thin, though! ^^

4. white or black? i love white sa guys! ^^

5. chinito or nOt? I like chinito and smiling eyes!

6. long hair or short hair? short! long hair is a no no for me hehe!

7. eyes, nOse or lips? lips! weeeee!

8. good boy look or a bad boy look? look lang ba? challenging ang bad boy image hehe!

9. punk,hiphop or rocker? simple! ^_^

10. popular or a simple guy? simple ulit! ^_^

11. henna or tattoo? ayaw!! wala wala! hehe!

12. tshirt or polo? polo! the best ang white!

13. lots of "ex"s or less? less.... hehe!

14. a smoker or nOt? not!!!! i quitted smoking na kasi!

15. a player or a joker? joker!someone who can make me laugh!

16. a loose shirt or a body fit? loose shirt! mukhang dance instruction pag fit! yuck! ^^

Thats my type of guy..... Whats yours?

The Gamer's Paranoia

2005-12-20T01:47:00.000-08:00

What we learn in loving....

You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back.
--Barbara DeAngelis

Shake It Off

2005-12-12T22:34:00.000-08:00

I gotta shake you off
Cause the loving ain't the same
And you keep on playing games
Like you know I'm here to stay

I gotta shake you off
Just like the Calgon commercial
I really gotta get up outta here
And go somewhere

I gotta shake you off
Gotta make that move
Find somebody who
Appreciates all the love I give

Boy I gotta shake you off
Gotta do what's best for me
Baby and that means I gotta
Shake you off

By the time you get this message
It's gonna be too late
So don't bother paging me
Cause I'll be on my way

See I grabbed all my diamonds and clothes
Just ask your momma she knows
You're gonna miss me baby
Hate to say I told you so
Well at first I didn't know
But now it's clear to me
You would cheat with all your freaks
And lie compulsively
So I packed up my Louis Vuitton
Jumped in your ride and took off
You'll never ever find a girl
Who loves you more than me

I cant update my blog! So many things to do, so little time. T_T I am so b-o-r-e-d!!!! Someone take this boredom away please!!!

Kill Me When November Comes

2005-09-27T17:28:00.000-07:00

Im falling into an abyss of mixed emotions. As the days come close to the month of November, I feel like dying slowly day by day. I keep on saying that Im okay... that I have recovered... that I don't cry anymore... but deep inside me I know Im still broken... I am still shattered.

Why does it have to be this way. Why does it have to end so unexpectedly. All I asked for was a space between us so that we can have a chance to know ourselves better. I held on to my pride because I want him to learn something. But he gave up on me and decided to start a life of his own.

June 30 could have been our wedding date... By November, it could have been me that would be giving birth to the child he has been longing for...No matter how I keep on reminding myself that God paved the way of separating us because of His own reasons, I just keep on holding on. God knows the best for me and He knows that I have a lot of dreams before me. He knows that starting a family is not yet on my list. But as the stubborn-headed girl that I am, I still let my emotions overrule my sanity.

Love is the best feeling there is... but this experience made me fear what is beyond loving. Does it have to mean we have to risk being hurt? Does love means that we have to endure the pain? Does love means that we just have to let go?

I am not sure what the answers are. I just cant get my eyes off the calendar and start counting the days til November.

Song In My Mind

2005-09-27T08:35:00.000-07:00

"Wake Me Up When September Ends"

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
wake me up when september ends

like my fathers come to pass
seven years has gone so fast
wake me up when september ends

here comes the rain again
falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
becoming who we are

as my memory rests
but never forgets what I lost
wake me up when september ends

summer has come and passed
the innocent can never last
wake me up when september ends

ring out the bells again
like we did when spring began
wake me up when september ends

here comes the rain again
falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
becoming who we are

as my memory rests
but never forgets what I lost
wake me up when september ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
wake me up when september ends

like my father's come to pass
twenty years has gone so fast
wake me up when september ends
wake me up when september ends
wake me up when september ends

How To Handle Love

2005-09-21T16:30:00.000-07:00

If you find yourself in love with someone who does not love you, be gentle with yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn't choose to rest in the other person's heart. If you find someone else in love with you and you don't love her/him, feel honoured that love came and called at your door, but gently refuse the gift you cannot return. Do not take advantage, do not cause pain. How you deal with love is how you deal with you, and all our hearts feel the same pains and joys, even if our lives and ways are different. If you fall in love with another, and she falls in love with you, and then love chooses to leave, do not try to reclaim it or to assess blame, Let it go. There is a reason and there is a meaning. You will know in time. Remember that you don't choose love. Love chooses you. All you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it comes into your life. Feel the way it fills you to overflowing, then reach out and give it away. Give it back to the person who brought it alive in you. Give it to others who deem it poor in spirit. Give it to the world around you in anyway you can. This is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long without love, they understand love only as a need. They see their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love, and they begin to look at love as something that flows to them rather than from them.

The first blush of new love is filled to overflowing, but as their love cools, they revert to seeing their love as need. They cease to be someone who generates love and instead become someone who seeks love. They forget that the secret of love is that it is a gift, and that it can be made to grow only by giving it away. Remember this, and keep it to your heart. Love has its own time, its own seasons, and its own reason for coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it, or reason it into saying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you. But if it chooses to leave from your heart or from the heart of your lover, there is nothing you can do and there is nothing you should do. Love always has been and always will be a mystery.

Be glad that it came to live for a moment in your life. Don't deny love just only you don't want to be hurt...IF YOU KEEP YOUR HEART OPEN, IT WILL COME AGAIN....

Reason Why Women Find It Hard 2 Find The Man

2005-09-21T10:37:00.000-07:00

1. The nice men are ugly.
2. The handsome men are not nice.
3. The handsome and nice men are gay.
4. The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married.
5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.
6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money.
7. The handsome men without money are after our money.
8. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don't think we are
beautiful enough.
9. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money, are cowards.
10. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and thank God are heterosexual, are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!
11. The men who never make the first move automatically lose interest in us when we take the
initiative.

NOW, WHO THE HELL UNDERSTANDS MEN?

"Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job, to stomp on them and
keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with."

How to Tell Someone You Love Them

2005-09-06T10:46:00.000-07:00

A question came from the feedback form on one of the Web sites in which I am involved. "How do you tell a girl how much you love her?" I don't often answer such questions personally, there are people more qualified than I to handle them, but before I knew it, I had written a long answer.

Looking back over my response, I realized it could have broader implications, so I decided to share it with you...

How do you tell a girl how much you love her?

You don't.

You show her.

You be her friend.

You be there for her when she needs someone to talk to.

You cry with her when she is sad, and you are happy for her when she succeeds at something, even if - no, make that ESPECIALLY if - she does that thing better than you do. And you do all you can to see that she succeeds at things often.

You give her what she needs, when she needs it, emotionally I mean, not "things."

And if you do really love her, not just think she is hot, or are infatuated with her, you will do all this expecting nothing in return.

And I mean NOTHING.

If you expect anything from her, you do not love her, you just want to be loved by her. Everyone wants to be loved, but to be loved, you must love.

If you do these things well, one day she will come to you and confide in you about something she feels badly about, because, if you do these things well enough for long enough, it will be you she will want to confide in. When she does, you make sure she knows that it matters to you that this bothers her. If you have advice for her, save it until you are sure she knows you care, and that her feelings matter very much to you.

Once you are sure of this, you may offer your advice, but know that the caring is more important than your idea of how the problem might be "fixed."

Loving her is not admiring the way she looks or anything else about her. These may be among the reasons you are attracted to her, but they are not acts of loving. Loving her is a series of actions, things you do for her, for no other reason than you love her.

Loving her is not wanting her to give you attention, or to give you anything for that matter. Loving her is wanting to give, not get. That is how you love someone. You give to them all you can give and expect nothing back. Once you have done these things well enough for long enough, and her eyes tell you she longs to hear you tell her, then you will have earned the right to tell her how much you love her.

By Warren Kramer, Editor of Daily Wisdom, Creative Director

Blog Grrr! Episode 2

2005-09-03T20:09:00.000-07:00

Hmmm.. I made a lot of changes here in my blog. Errr... it is already taking most of my time. Anddd I must say, Mozilla is still the best browser. *Grin* Well, I painstakignly edited the sidebar and added the friendster album links, calendar and I added a little snow flakes effect.

Please free to comment.

Oh btw, ShoutBox is not working. Will check it next time. Hafta go!

Uwian na! Weeeeee... its my rest daaaaay!!!

See ya again. =)

Top 5 Random Thoughts

2005-09-01T10:52:00.000-07:00

1. It's pajama party here at the office!

Hahahha! Yeah right! We are all dressed up in pyjamas!

We are actually sharing this floor with another call center company... and you cannot imagine the stares that we are getting. It may look corny for them. But I love this daring idea! It shows how comfortable we are at the floor to the point of agreeing to do something crazy together. Pictures and videos are being taken simultaneously and I promise to post it here when I get to grab a copy of those.

Gotta get that headset before my eyes give in to having a nap. ... zzzzzzzzzzzzz

Uh oh.. pano kami lalabas ng building para magyosi break? Errrr... panu nga ba?? Patay!Baka akalain ng mga nagtratrabaho sa building na ito eh naligaw na sila.. at hotel ang napuntahan nila. ^^

2. My blog is a disaster!

It doesnt look well in Internet Explorer but it works fine in Mozilla browser. And I am going nuts trying to figure out the source code... editing one line and another! Hmmm... I hate programming!

3. I am so irritated by my uber sensitive nose! I can smell only the extremes but not those in between! A while ago I was in the MRT and this guy had a terrible smell early in the morning. I dont know if he wasnt able to brush his teeth or he hasnt changed for years!!! The worst part is that he kept on squeezing his body on my side. Grrrrr... patayin ko kaya ito? And so I realized there's nothing I can do (about his smell.. errr never mind how he looks.. I better not talk about it ^^)... I decided to pretend I'm not smelling anything for the rest of the MRT ride!! And mahirap gawin yun ha!

4. My appetite is going down. For the past three days I have been feeling this way. You know my table here in the office is always full of food of all kinds. You can find Fudgee bar (given by Erik -- moi punching bag.. I just love punching him.. heheheh umangal sha papatayin ko sha), then theres choco crinkles (madalas mga 2 pieces hehehe)...theres tacos.. or mais....or my mug with coffee... and a pack of Marlboro Menthol on the side (ay d pala pagkain ito hehehe)... and list will go on....and on.....

Erik always looks at me and will smirk and say "Yel.. kumakain ka na naman!".... but what can I do.. I just love eating!!!!

But these past few days was terrible. I dont eat at all.

I remember eating 2 servings of balot (yes the one with sisiw!) a few nights ago. But I ate with Erik, Maru, Brian and Mhai. But nothing happened to them. And then I started having LBM-like activities that night... I mean LBM-like lang kasi it is not that frequent movement.. pero my "thing" is very loose and watery... (errrr do I have to be very descriptive on this).. sorry hehehe... basta... it is not frequent.. sa bahay lang... And the next day.. until yesterday.. I had ulcer attacks....

Bakit ganun sila okay naman......

Hayyy.. I hope I will be okay now.....

5. Lord, grant me patience. Yes, I need patience.. and lots of it. Yes working in a call center needs a lot of patience. I get sooooooooooooo irritated with callers who.. I dont know what... if they are really playing stupid or they really are stooopid.. (sorry I am mean)..

Here's the typical conversations I experienced:

All smiling.. I got the call and said: "Good morning. This is Marielle. How can I help you today?"
The other person in the line hisses on the phone. "hmpppph. bzzzzzzzzz.."
"Ah.. hello.. Sir.... how can I help you.." I am sounding a little irritated na.
Another hiss. With loud sounds pa sa background.
I'm about to say my spiel for callers like this.. then all of a sudden the hissing caller shouted: "P*#&^@ ina mo!" and he put the phone down literally banging it!

And I became the shocked Marielle. I cant react for the next 2 seconds. When I got my senses back I cursed him like hell. "Ahhhhh.. F&^% you! Mamatay ka na hayop ka animal ka peste kaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!"

And I cannot get the logic why these callers shout on call center agents. Who the hell they think they are! Kainis! Hehehehe. And that was my first call huh! What a good way to start my working day! So how do you expect me to be patient?!!

Lord grant me patience please.....

Ooopppss.. its 10:51 already... got to work.... =)

Have you ever?

2005-09-01T10:10:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered which hurts the most, saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing and wishing you had? I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say. Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break your heart... but if you don't, you might break theirs.

Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person? Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't. You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own.... when you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.

Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you? Too many of us stay walled because we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or at all.

Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle? We tell lies when we are afraid.... afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think ,afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie.... the thing we fear grows stronger. Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have, or could have had.

but what would you do....

... if every time you fell in love you had to say good-bye?
... if every time you wanted someone they would never be there?
... if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got to tell them how you felt?
... if you loved someone more than ever and you couldn't have them?
... if you never got the chance to say I am friends with all of my family and they know I
love them?

Some people love, and some people die. But I want to tell you that you are a friend. If something happened to me tomorrow, you would be in my heart. Would I be in yours?

The Solution!

2005-08-31T18:27:00.000-07:00

Now I know! A big big thanks to ambiguous wanderer for all the information he has given me. I think I will have to promote a BETTER browser this time! For better viewing pleasure, try using Mozilla browser. Hehehe! I think the IE Version 7.0 is not yet available. Heavens... this is making my head ache!

Hmmm...

Blog Grrr!

2005-08-31T17:24:00.000-07:00

There seems to be a BIG problem here in my blog. I tried opening it in Mozilla browser and it looked perfectly okay but when I tried viewing it using Internet Explorer, its a mess!

Need help badly! Grrr!!

Why Bad Things Happen To Good People?

2005-08-31T10:07:00.000-07:00

Lifted from email.

To the question why bad things happen to good people, here's a simple answer. It doesn't really help when bad things do happen, but it's a way of looking at things.

A ninety-one year old woman died after living a long dignified life. When she met God she asked him something that had long bothered her. If Man was created in God's image, and if all men are created equal, why do people treat each other so badly? God replied that each person who enters our life has a unique lesson to teach us. And it is only through these lessons that we learn about life, people, relationships and God.

This confused the woman,so God began to explain. When someone lies to you it teaches you that things are not always as they seem. The truth is often far beneath the surface. Look beyond the masks people wear if you want to know their heart. And remove your own masks to let people know yours.

When someone steals from you it teaches you that nothing is forever. Always appreciate what you have, for you never know when you might lose it. And never, ever take your friends and family for granted because today is the only guarantee you have.

When someone inflicts an injury upon you it teaches you that the human state is a fragile one. Protect and take care of your body as best you can, it's the only thing you are sure to have forever.

When someone mocks you it teaches you that no two people are alike. When you encounter people who are different from you, don't judge them by how they look or act; instead base your opinion on the contents of their heart.

When someone breaks your heart it teaches you that loving someone does not always mean that person will love you back. But don't turn your back on love because when you find the right person, the joy that one person brings will make up for all the past hurts put together. Times ten.

When someone holds a grudge against you it teaches you that everyone makes mistakes. When you are wronged, the most virtuous thing you can do is forgive the offender without pretense. Forgiving those who have hurt us is the most difficult and courageous thing Man can do.

When a loved one is unfaithful to you it teaches you that resisting temptation is Man's greatest challenge. Be vigilant in your resistance against all temptation. By doing so you will be rewarded with an enduring sense of satisfaction far greater than the temporary pleasure by which you were tempted.

When someone cheats you, it teaches you that greed is the root of all evil. Aspire to make your dreams come true, no matter how lofty they may be. Do not feel guilty about your success, but never let an obsession with achieving your goals lead you to engage in malevolent activities.

When someone ridicules you it teaches you that nobody is perfect. Accept people for their merits and be tolerant of their flaws. Do not ever reject someone for imperfections over which they have no control.

Upon hearing the Lord's wisdom, the old woman became concerned that there were no lessons to be learned from Man's good deeds. God replied that Man's capacity to love is the greatest gift he has. At the root of all kindness is love, and each act of love also teaches us a lesson.

The woman's curiosity deepening, God once again began to explain. When someone loves us it teaches us that love,kindness, charity, honesty, humility, forgiveness and acceptance can counteract all the evil in the world. For every good deed, there is one less evil deed. Man alone has the power to control the balance between good and evil, but because the lessons of love are not taught often enough, the power is too often abused.

When you enter someone's life, whether by plan, chance or coincidence, consider what your lesson will be. Will you teach love or a harsh lesson of reality? When you die will your life have resulted in more loving or hurting? More comfort or pain? More joy or sadness?

Each one of us has power over the balance of love in the world. Use it wisely. Don't miss an opportunity to nudge the world's scale in the right direction.

The Online Psychologist

2005-08-31T09:58:00.000-07:00

Hmmm... these tests are funny and very interesting. I find myself smirking and laughing at myself for some are true while some are very exaggerated. Take time to test yourself by clicking the link. Enjoy! =)

Who's the True You?

The True You
You want your girlfriend or boyfriend to be more relaxed, calm, and composed.
With respect to money, you are a bit stingy.
You think good luck might come your way, but if it does you'll be so surprised you'll burst out laughing.
The hidden side of your personality tends to be satisfied to care for things with a minimal amount of effort.
You are tend to think about others' feelings a lot, perhaps because you are so eager to be liked.
When it comes to finding a romantic partner, you don't have any particular type in mind, but you are inclined to look for someone who will say yes when you ask him / her out.

How Do People See You?

Slow and Steady
Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy.

They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder.

It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment.

They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it.

What's Your Love Type?

Your #1 Love Type: ENFP
The Inspirer

In love, you are passionate and eager to develop a strong bond.

For you, sex should be playful, creative, and affectionate.

Overall, you are perceptive and bring out the best in your partner.

However, you tend to hold on to bad relationships after they've turned bad.

Best matches: INTJ and INFJ

Your #2 Love Type: ENFJ
The Giver

In love, you give your all and feel guilty when relationships fail.

For you, sex is not seperate from love and caring.

Overall, you are humorous, giving, and motivational.

However, you tend to be over-protective and critical of your partner.

Best matches: INFP or ISFP

Your #3 Love Type: ENTP
The Visionary

In love, you are always trying to improve and grow your relationship.

For you, sex should be a spontaneous adventure.

Overall, you are magnetic, inspiring, and a charmer.

However, you tend to get bored and want to change partners frequently.

Best matches: INFJ and INTJ

Your #4 Love Type: ESFP
The Performer

In love, you relish every moment and tend to get caught up in passion.

For you, sex is how you get in touch with all your senses.

Overall, you are creative, popular, and flexible.

However, you tend to dislike criticism and avoid any conflict.

Best matches: ISTJ or ISFJ

Your #5 Love Type: ENTJ
The Executive

In love, you seek relationships that you can grow and learn from.

For you, sex should always be exciting and experimental.

Overall, you are bright, energetic, and helpful.

However, you tend to be challenging and confrontational.

Best matches: INTP and ISTP

What Do Your Dreams Mean?

What Your Dreams Mean...

Your dreams seem to show that you're a bit disturbed... but nothing serious.

You may have a problem you're trying to work out in your sleep.

You have a very vivid imagination and a rich creative mind.

You secretly want to hide your dreams from your waking mind.

Are You Romantic or Realistic?

You Are A Romantic Realist

You are more romantic than 50% of the population.

You tend to be grounded when it comes to romance.

Sure, you can fall hard... but only for someone you've gotten to know.

And once you're in love, you can be a total romantic goofball...

But you'd never admit it to your friends!

What's Your Ideal Relationship?

Your Ideal Relationship is Marriage

You've dated enough to know what you want.

And that's marriage - with the right person.

You're serious about settling down some time soon.

Even if you haven't met the person you want to get hitched to!

What Kind of Friend Are You?

You Are A Good Friend

You're always willing to listen

Or lend a shoulder to cry on

You're there through thick and thin

Many people consider you their "best friend"!

I normally do not believe in these. But whats there to lose anyway right? Hmmm....

My Realizations

2005-08-27T15:19:00.000-07:00

Hmmmm... this came from my topic in the forums I used to be active in (the link). Have nothing to do that much at the moment so might as well post something mushy. Its better than no post at all, right? (I am sooooo booooreeed here...)

1.What do you think of ligaw?

-Making ligaw is the Filipino term for courting someone. Usually it is being done by guys to girls they fancy. Ligawan used to be a serious activity between the opposite sexes during the old times. Now i guess because of this ever changing world...ligawan is not taken seriously anymore. ^_^

2.Do you believe that friends can be lovers, but lovers can never be friends?

- yes.. im a believer of that and yan ang nigagawa ko ngyon ehehe..it seems to be very difficult to be friends with someone who became a part of you...nakakailang for me.. but this sounds good if it can happen... at least you know each other very well already....there's no need to pretend/hide anything

3.Do you believe that you can learn to love someone kahit hindi mo talaga sya mahal?

- Hmmm.. it depends.. but this needs a lot of time and super effort to let the love really bloom...its very hard to be fed when you really dont feel like eating, right?

4.What's your ideal partner?

- ideal partner??…. Hmmmmm.. (daydreams..sabay me stars stars sa mata ^^) ... I want a simple person.. someone with dreams and ambition... a family man... meaning responsible... I find a guy who's very sweet with his mother veryyy amusing... Looks doesnt matter to me anymore... Its very superficial to base relationships on physical attributes....(besides...mas maraming may itsura na manloloko.. hmm aminin!!! ^_^) I also want someone who wont make promises...Im so tired on believing on them kasi.... Maybe.. hindi pa napapanganak ideal partner ko hahahaha.....

5.Have you met your soulmate?

- I dont think so... though im wishin and praying I'll meet him soon....

6.Is it true na ang love nawawala o nababawasan lang?

- Nagsisimula mawala ang love kapag nababawasan na siya.. meaning bakit ba nababawasan ang love? Nababawasan siya kapag you start seeing his/her negative sides na dati di mo makita because you were so in love with that persona dati...nababawasan ang love when you can no longer stand his/her inadequacies... habang unti unti nababawasan ang love na yon.. darating ang time na eventually.. love will cease na.... (magulo ata..nahilo din ako..basta yun na yun! ^_^)

7.Have you really let go of someone?

- yeah.. I just did....

8.How many bfs/gfs have you had?

- 2 serious ones... first lasted a year and a month.. the second was three years....gf..wala pa.. I might try ^^

9.Are you always serious when it comes to relationships?

- Yes I am... kaya when di ko na kaya talaga or.. nawawala na yung love ko.. I hate pretending to be in love.. its better to end the relationship than live in lies...

10.Which one do you prefer, friendship or relationship?

- same…. A relationship without friendship is like wearing ur clothes without undies… they go together. ... both are good... though the latter needs commitment to last....

11.Why?

- basta.. alam mo din yun.. nagsisimula sa fwendship ang isang relationship dba dba dba ahihihihh.. ah ewannnn

12.Have you fallen in love with your bestfriend?

- hmmm.. I did.. yeah ryt.. I did eheheh (past tense yan ha)

13.Have you fallen in love with someone you regret on loving?

- yes.. You know the feeling na sana di ka na nasaktan pa...the questions na sana di mo na sha nakilala... you know what I am saying?? Too bad I fall so deep na I become TANGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA..... hehehehehe

14.If yes, why do you regret?

- Secret.. akin na lang yun...

15.Are you in a serious/fling relationship right now or just plain single?

- Plaaaaaaiiiinnnn single... and enjoying it....

16.Are you a player?

- Mu player ryt.. ehehe.. kidding aside…no d po… takot me sa karma.. and naniniwala ako s karma hehe.. kapag di na kaya... call it quits na ...

17.Are you too serious with your relationships?

- yes.. inuuna ko intindihin ang heart bago ang isip hehehe..basta kapag mahal ko .. mahal ko.. and no one can control me on what to do with it..and how I want the relationship to be..

18.Are you a martyr?

- yes.. sobrah…. Cried many gallons already ahihih

19.Do you believe in marriage first before living in or vice-versa?

- marriage muna……

20.Why?

- kahit ganito ako na totoong tao[naks].. ahihih… I am still a devout Christian with morals… ska.. gusto ko naman magsuot ng wedding gown and walk down the aisle... and... and....

21.Are you a "still say yes" person or a "no, no, no" when it comes to reconciliation with any of your exs?

- I am a NO NO NO NO NO.. whats finished is already finished.. no looking back… no 2nd chances…. no way no no no no!

22.Do you look ahead to your future or do you look behind to your past?

- looking ahead to my future…. Learning from my past..

23.Why do you think most relationships dont last?

- because the other loved too much and the other loved too little…hmmm...

24.Do you really think love can conquer all? Why?

- it depends if u've found true love……then yes, you can conquer EVERYTHING....

25.Whats your motto when it comes to love?

- motto? hmm... what i can only say is.. I wanna know what real love means.. yun lang.... =)

Back to work... my mind is spinning already because of hunger. Now, back to work again. ^_^

My Top Three's

2005-08-26T14:01:00.000-07:00

I kinda read this post in a friend's blog. Hmmmm.... let me make mine too! =)

3 names i go by:
1. maria elsa (my infamous name... haha i just love my name... but never call me this way please.. )
2. marielle (and many variations: yel, yellie, ielle, yel yel vonnel ^^, mars.. funny how they address me... )
3. lenlen ( my childhood name...hahaha..... ang kyut! ^_^)

3 screen names i have:
1. angelgirl (online name in MU Philippines, GoPets and forums)
2. t_______________ (secret hahahahaha... d pa pede i-post eh)
3. hmmm.. wala na. i have two only.. ive been using angelgirl eversince and i plan to keep it.... ^^

3 physical things i like about myself
1. eyes... hehehhehe..
2. my teeth.... makes me smile a lot
3. my color... proud to be kayumanggi!!!!!

3 physical things i don't like about myself
1. physically.... my fatssss!!! i am so fat!!!! i want to lose weight!!!!!
2. my height.. i wish i would be taller...
3. my freckles.warts.keloids? i dunno what to call them... bsta it resembles nunal na brown ^^.. dami kasi 'kainis!

3 parts of my heritage (excluding Filipino)
1. spanish
2. chinese
3. uhmm german? wakokok.. actually spanish and chinese only ahihihihihi

3 things that scare me
1. death
2. solitude
3. ipppiiiiiiiissss.... and anything that crawls.... yuck yuck yuck!!!!

3 of my everyday essentials
1. celphone
2. vanity kit ( i dont need to elaborate on this heheeheh .... every girl needs this eheehhehe)
3. money!!!

3 of my favorite musicians (composers, and bands)
1. ekk musicians?? bands eh.. hmm The Corrs
2. The Corrs
3. The Corrs... (wala pa maisip at the moment)

3 of my favourite songs
1. all the love in the world
2. i wanna know what love is
3. at your best.... ( i have so many .. as in.. tons of fave songs.... ahihihi )

3 things you want in a relationship
1. i want commitment .. someone who will stay with me.....someone who wont promise me heaven but will give me one...
2. acceptance.... someone who will accept who i am.. what i can give...what i cannot... what i can be.. and what i am .... this comes with contentment i guess..... =)
3. i want having God in the midst of our relationship... with Him I am sure everything will be puuurrrfect!!!

3 lies in my life
1. i am happy now
2. i dont need someone at the moment
3. i will quit smoking!!! (asa ka pa!!!!!!)

3 truths in my life
1. my mom is the most impt person in my life.....
2. i am in search for that "someone" still...
3. i am sad.. very sadddddddddddddd....

3 physical things about the opposite sex that appeal to me
1. someone with a warm smile.... hehehehe
2. dimples.. the best abnormality actually.. pero i like it..
3. height ^^

3 of my hobbies right now
1. blogging... pero not that much pa.. busy kasi
2. MU Phillipines
3. GoPets

3 things i want to do really badly now
1. i miss being hugged and kissed.. hayyy...
2. eat and eat and eatttttttt
3. i want to be on a vacation sa beach... for 1 month.....relax relax relaxxxxx

3 careers i've considered doing
1. singing too bad sa bathroom lang ako nakakapagconcert.....
2. dancing.... hehehe street dance...
3. writing and publishing my book... too bad i still have little time....

3 places i would like to go on vacation to
1. the Taj Mahal
2. beach.. anywhere can do
3. hmmmm errr... Disneyland ^^ wala ako maisip at the moment

3 kid's names i like
1. Alessandria Zophia
2. Andreanna Bianca/Blanca
3. Alessandro/Alexander Rafael

3 things i wanna do before i die
1. get married and have more than 5 kids!!!! a big big family... and have lots and lots of grandchildren
2. grant whatever my mom wants in life.....
3. when the moment comes that I am already contented with my life.. thats the time I wanna die....

3 ways that i am a stereotypical girl
1. i want hugggggggsssss and kissesssssssss.... ^^
2. i want attention and more attention... papansin ako in short....
3. hmmm.. im sucker for the real meaning of love..... T_T

Funny funny..... Nice to fill up. Hahahah. I will try and look for more. I am so hungry, btw! Haven't taken my breakfast and lunch and it is already 2pm!!!! Sheez!

Be back in a jiffy! ^_^

Ironically Speaking

2005-08-24T14:07:00.000-07:00

I cant believe I'll be seeing you again. It's been quite a while since we decided to let our pride overrule our emotions. Too bad you succeeded in breaking my heart into pieces again. When you and I were still together, too many times I've shed my tears for petty reasons..too many times I've let you hurt me. Yes you've hurted me a lot and I let it happen all because I have loved you too much. It's just so ironic that even now... you are still hurting me.

I thought it was enough to be separated from you for 8 months. I thought I was strong...I thought I could pretend to be okay. But after all those months... you still haunt me. What makes me hurt the more is that I'm seeing you happy while here I am.. still broken and still shattered.

How I wish you could feel this pain. How I wish you will wake up one night crying out my name. How I wish you'd get drunk and cry your heart out. How I wish you'd puff 20 sticks of Marlboro Reds just to forget me. How I wish you can also destroy your life the way I am doing now. There were also moments that I feel like using that sharp blade on my dresser. I wanted to die because Im too tired of crying and feeling all this pain. But then I realize that you are somebody not worth dying for. I won't end my life just for you.

Someday... in God's plan, I will be happy again. For the meantime... I want to be numb. Life is ironic nga.

I Want Banana Split!!

2005-08-19T21:49:00.000-07:00

Yummy ... yummy.. yummyyyyyy!!!

Too bad diet ako!!!!! Huhuhuh!!!

What Will I Wear

2005-08-18T10:43:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow will be not just an ordinary day. Its our THEME DAY in the office! Too bad the first theme is the 1980's fashion!!! Until now I still don't know what to wear!!! Dang! Hmmm.. let me make my research first about this...

The 80's Fashion

The 80s has such diverse fashion, from the crazy hair styles to the scruncy socks, the 80's fashion is on ethat is most likely not too missed.

The Hairstyle

Hair styles of the 80s are the most diverse and funny charateristics of this decade. In early 80s, fashion styles kicked off the decade with great hair experimentation. For a while their seemed to be a competition to see who could build the tallest hair and have the strangest angles. After the early 80s hair extravagance of strange colors and cuts, the fashion settled down by about 1984, and focused on one simple concept - volume. More hair was better. The 'Hair Bands' of the 1980s applied this style which was strongest around 1987-88. Your hair could go up, out and down - as long as it wasn't straight. . You could even have short hair, as long as it 'up' (it didn't have to be up if your short hair was bleached, dyed a bright color or spiked with hair gel). Many accessories were available to assist with this process - you could tease your hair and stick it up with mousse. Some mousse even contained glitter or other sparkle pieces to give your hair 'extra interest and indivduality'. If you think shampoo stings, try getting glitter mouse in your eyes - a common occurrence as some brands tended to flake.

The 80's Look

Shoulder padded suits and traditional culture looks , so prevalent during the 80's, were almost obsolete Leg warmers started with dancers - and are still worn by many dancers today. In around 1983 they started making an appearance in wider society. Leg warmers were no longer black or some other functional color, now they were speckled, fluoro and some were worn so low that they would have been better known as ankle warmers. The true fans of these would wear them to a sweaty nightclub - even in summer. Strangely, leg warmers managed to hang around a little longer than many other 80's fashions and they didn't meet their fate until late 1984. By 85, they were extinct.

1. Headband
The headband, like leg warmers, is another ultimate 1980s fashion item. It lasted most of the decade from Duran Duran at the start of the decade, right through to the end.

2. Cats Eye Mirror Glasses
Not just your regular mirror glasses, but these are 'Cats Eyes'. Mirror glasses were hard to wear because they were often too dark. In addition, your eyes dilated too far and often caught too much stray radiation. To solve these problems, the tinting was reduced at the center and they looked like cat's eyes.

3. Fluoro Suit
Perfect color combination -pastels are too 'early 80s' to wear. Instead it is best to wear yellow, red and green-ish suitS. None of the colors should be too primary or dark.

Evening Ski Wear

Fluoro is fine on the ski fields, but it is 'so out' to wear fluoro or your ski suit at night. You will probably need to ditch the headband and sunglasses too. Since you will be skiing, it is safe to assume that it will be cold and you will need something warm. Around the world people call these woollen tops, jumpers, pullovers or sweaters

Parachute Pants

Fairly tight nylon pants with zippered patch pockets, the usual 2 front + 2 back, plus one or two on each leg. Zippered ankles. Parachute Pants were the craze in the mid 80s and now there back.

Satin jackets

Shiny jackets that buttoned down the front. Collar and wristbands always had two stripes (usually white). Most people wore them in their school colors, or had the name of their school on the back.

Bangle bracelets

These came in sets, 10-15 of them in a pack. They were made of lightweight metal and came in goldtone, silvertone and colors. You wore them all at once, halfway up your forearm.

So how does it look like? Take a peek below.

Hahaha. The last two photos freaked me out! Dang!

Ano kaya gagawin ko. Huhuhuh!

Last Night Was A Bliss

2005-08-17T09:47:00.000-07:00

---------

A Blissful Experience

Yeah right. It was a bliss. A good friend of mine , celebrated her birthday last August 15 and she treated us last night. We ate at Cafe d' Angelo in Glorietta. Ms. Maru ordered for us a platter of spaghetti, pizza and a very big piece of chicken (you cant imagine how big it is!). We had a hard time finishing our own plates. You know the feeling of being tortured to eat that you wanted to shout, "Tama na!!! Suko na ako!!" Well, I am not being exaggerated here. Thats how we all felt!

In between munches, we had good laughs that almost made us all puke. The funny thing was Maru kept on looking at me and then she would laugh so hard making me wonder whats wrong with my face! Kainis... mukha ba akong clown!

Well, maybe you were wondering who came with us last night. The guests are the following: Mhy & Carl , Erik and Ivan and the special guest, Tyre . So in short, I was the only one without a partner! Dang!Hayy.. magkakapartner den ako bwahahahah!!!

Anyways....I will post the pictures here okay! Heheh... nag shooting kami doon eh hahahha!

I will post this picture. I will tell you next time what this is all about. Hahahha.

My ONLY birthday wish for Ms. Maru is REAL HAPPINESS in life. You know happiness in a deeper meaning. Happiness that entails CONTENTMENT and PEACE. I wish you find real happiness Ms. Maru. And remember that I will always be here for you no matter what.

Sniff sniff!

---------

MRT Love Scene

Well what's new!!! Im so fed up of riding the MRT every single day of my life! You know the feeling of being pushed and shoved brutally every single day???!! The funny thing is, you start the day feeling fresh and all and the moment you go alight the train, you start smelling like rotten fish! Grhhhhh!It makes me wish for a car! But the problem is I cannot afford it yet. Hayyy.

Someday.... someday..... ^_^

Hahahah. Here's another lovestruck experience in the MRT just a few hours ago.

Oh well...I spotted this guy. He looked so perfectly shaven, wearing crisp clothes and all. His nails were so clean and his smile so perfect it almost took my breath away. So I was making simple glances on him rather than staring real hard . I could say he was indeed a perfect sight. And then the funny part started. Cubao station came and of course, what do you expect in that station... I glanced to see the people and God! as in Oh MY God! talaga... andameng momo este tao hahahaha!!!. So I already prepared for the "tragedy" that was about to come. So pumasok ung mga momo este tao... I heard someone shrieked , "Wag ninyo ako itulak! Ano baaah!" So I was about to laugh silently of course , and looked where the irritating but funny voice came from.

It was him. The guy with clean nails and perfect smile.

Dang!

What a good way to start my day! Hahahahha. Sayang....

Last Song Syndrome:

2005-08-15T14:16:00.000-07:00

At Your Best

When I feel what I feel
Sometimes it's hard to tell you so
You may not be in the mood to learn what you think you know

There are times when I find
You wanna keep yourself from me
When I don't have the strength; I'm just a mirror of what I see

But at your best you are love
You're a positive motivating force within my life
Should you ever feel the need to wonder why
Let me know, let me know
know, let me know

When you feel what you feel
Oh, how hard for me to understand
So many things have taken place before this love affair began

But if you feel, girl, like I feel
Confusion can give way to doubt
For there are times when I fall short of what I say,
What I say I'm all about, all about

But at your best you are love
You're a positive motivating force within my life
Should you ever feel the need to wonder why
Let me know, let me know

Tell me what it is [Tell me what it is]
There's no need to make believe
[Make believe, no need to make believe]
Look beyond your world [Look beyond your world]
Try and find a place for me [Try and find, a better place for me]

Cause at your best you are love
You're a positive motivating force within my life
And if you ever feel the need to wonder why
Let me know, let me know
let me know 3x
know...
stay at your best, baby...

Can't Say I Love You

Hey baby, we just met
I have him
You have her
If we fall for each other
Would it be unfair
Loving one another this way

You see
I love him so much
And you love her too
But baby when I met you
I felt love so true

Can’s say that I love you
But I do
Cant say that I miss you
Though its true
Sometimes I feel I wanna kiss you
And hold you in my arms so tight
But all I can do is stop myself
From loving you

If only if I have met you before
When no one else is knockin on my door
I’ll let you in to my heart
Then maybe that’s the start
Of a promise that will never be part

But if you and me are not meant to be
Let’ just set each other free
Let it be

And if you and me together
Means forever
Then let’s take the chance
And build this romance

But if lovin each other
Would only mean never
Let fate bring our back to our lovers
Who promised us forever

Im Flying Away

2005-08-12T17:39:00.000-07:00

I wake up
I wash my face and go
here’s another day, I'm sure
I'll fight for what I love

and my music keeps going on
my heart begins to beat
and my music keeps going on
it makes my life complete

I’m flying away, I'm flying away
I’m flying away, I'm flying away

It's the sound I cannot live without
as the rhytm goes, I’m sure
my soul will never pause

and my music keeps going on
it opens up my eyes
and my music keeps going on
'cause one day I was blind

I’m flying away, I'm flying away
I’m flying away, I'm flying away

I'm flying...
I'm flying away

Smoking Spree

2005-08-09T18:46:00.000-07:00

I am in my quest to stop smoking. Sheez! IM actually paying the effects of it right now. But you see I started smoking just last March. I think I am about to be a chain smoker but then I am having the thoughts of quitting right know. Is it just because I'm sick? Aaaargh. I started smoking out of curiosity. A single puff led to dozen ones. My barkada started smoking, too and it became a common activity for all of us since then. I smoke when I have nothing to do, when I get bored, when I have a lot of things troubling me.

I am trying to quit. God help me. =)

Saw the following article in the net. hayy..share ko lang ahihihi

Health Effects of Smoking Among Young People

Among young people, the short-term health consequences of smoking include respiratory and non-respiratory effects, addiction to nicotine, and the associated risk of other drug use. Long-term health consequences of youth smoking are reinforced by the fact that most young people who smoke regularly continue to smoke throughout adulthood.
Cigarette smokers have a lower level of lung function than those persons who have never smoked.

Smoking reduces the rate of lung growth.

In adults, cigarette smoking causes heart disease and stroke. Studies have shown that early signs of these diseases can be found in adolescents who smoke.

Smoking hurts young people's physical fitness in terms of both performance and endurance---even among young people trained in competitive running.

On average, someone who smokes a pack or more of cigarettes each day lives 7 years less than someone who never smoked.

The resting heart rates of young adult smokers are two to three beats per minute faster than nonsmokers.¹

Smoking at an early age increases the risk of lung cancer. For most smoking-related cancers, the risk rises as the individual continues to smoke.

Teenage smokers suffer from shortness of breath almost three times as often as teens who don't smoke, and produce phlegm more than twice as often as teens who don't smoke.

Teenage smokers are more likely to have seen a doctor or other health professionals for an emotional or psychological complaint.

Teens who smoke are three times more likely than nonsmokers to use alcohol, eight times more likely to use marijuana, and 22 times more likely to use cocaine. Smoking is associated with a host of other risky behaviors, such as fighting and engaging in unprotected sex.

Mr. No Face

2005-08-09T10:42:00.000-07:00

At one point in your life, have you been awakened in the middle of the night thinking about what your future holds? When I mean future, I mean having that special someone that you will spend the rest of your life with. Well I just did. I woke up this morning feeling cold and all because of the weather and the thought just popped into my mind. I have imagined myself so many times being married, having kids and waiting for my hubby to arrive home. The funny thing is he has no face yet so let me call him Mr. No Face.

I have been searching for him all my life. I think I have spent three fourths of my life thinking about him and where I can find him. But still until now, after two serious relationships, I think Mr. No Face seem to have eluded me already. Maybe Mr. No Face decided to hide and never let himself known to me. Maybe he thinks that it is not yet the time for us to meet.

So I ask myself a lot of times, "Am I that willing to wait that long for you?". But somehow, I believe that somewhere he is also under the same sky I am looking at. Mr. No Face is also staring at the same star I am talking to every single night in my life. He also gazes on the vast horizons asking the same questions I have.

Maybe the time has not yet come for us. Maybe not now....

Here is a song I dedicate to Mr. No Face. Hope you read this. =)

Healing

by Deniece Williams

Now that we have gotten through
One more fall
I can just admit I've got it all
Cause I do
Cause I've got you
We've crossed these battle lines too many times
It passes through the heart
But it never leaves a mark

Cause Your love just keeps on healing me
No matter how I bruise
If I just trust You
Your love just keeps on healing me
One more cure
One more chance that wasn't there before
In your arms
no pain can harm the way im feeling
Lord I know that Your love is healing

I've kicked around those lines in my head
But I never listened to the words that You said
See where it's lead
Well I know I have it now
Cause You showed me how
And all I had to do
Was just to keep my eyes on You

Cause Your love just keeps on healing me
No matter how I bruise
If I just trust You
Your love just keeps on healing me
One more cure
One more chance that wasnt there before
In your arms
no pain can harm the way im feeling
Lord I know that Your love is healing

(break)

Cause Your love just keeps on healing me
No matter how I bruise
If I just trust You
Your love just keeps on healing me
One more clue
One more chance that wasnt there before
In your arms
no pain can harm the way im feeling

Platonic Love

2005-08-05T19:52:00.000-07:00

Matagal ko na siyang kilala...siguro mga isang taon na. Lagi ko siyang kasama. Pero mare, hindi kami eh. Wala lang, labas lang...gimik lang daw. Date ba? Hindi eh.. masyadong sensitive kasi yung word na date. But my friends say, DATE daw! Nakakakilabot naman yung word diba? Pareho talaga trip namin sa buhay. Hindi kami nauubusan ng mapag-usapan. Kahit paulit-ulit, okay lang. Kahit corny, okay lang. Basta, makausap ko sya. Period. Marinig ko lang boses nya na nagsasabi, "Busy ka ba?" Kahit sangkatutak na deadlines ang dapat kong gawin, I would simply lie just to be able to talk to him. Kahit pibe minutes lang, solve na araw ko.

Haay... ano ba talaga brother? May gusto ko ba sakin or wala? Anak ng pitongpu't pitong puting tupa, can somebody give me a correct answer? Gulong-gulo na ako! On the other hand, it's always nice to pondereveryday about the big question. Does he like me? May crush ba siya sakin? Sarap na talagang hiritan. Pero, SHY AKO EH! Is it time to be kapal-muks? ****!Pano pag sinabi nya, YES, I DO LIKE YOU. Syeter! Pero masakit pag sinabi nya, You are such a nice friend to me. Syetest! Ouch talaga!

But what can I expect? Ako si girl. Laging maiden-in waiting who dream of a knight-in-shining-armor guy who would swept me off my feet. Though, effective na napapablush

Relax my inner conscience. Say banana. Hinga.....banana. Sige pa,banana. Teka, bakit banana? Focus. Oh no sago, sya ang nasa isip ko! I am actually beginning to miss him more everyday. Miss kaya nya ako? Mag pa miss kaya ako. I have been planning not to text him for a long time to see what would he respond. Pero, di ko matiis. Fingers for texting..control. Yung billng cellphone ko, lumaglapas na hanggang langit. What if I lie sa phone at hindi ko sya kausapin for how many days? Will he give a damn about it?
Sana... Sana hahanapin nya ako like a police.

So, should I face the music or not? Should I take the risk to lay down all my cards and say, Bahala na kahit hindi nya ako gusto basta nasabi ko na feelings ko. Pero, pano nga pagwala syang pagtingin sakin? Wa poise!Will it change my outlook towards him? Will he look at me in a differentlight
din? Oh Lord, I need prayers. Mag Novena kaya ako sa Baclaran with matching luhod papuntang altar. Or kaya, ipadaan ko kaya sa third party? Ang panget naman. I wanna be honest also.. like I always do when I am with him.Chika
ka dyan sister! Honest daw! Eh ito puso mo, kumikirot at tatalsik na sa kalsada ng EDSA at di mo parin masabi na gusto mo siya. Maniwala ka dunsa, Our friendship will never change ek-ek.

Expect the worst but hope for the best. Yun ang motto ko ever since. Motto ng mga singles yan! But I have been expecting. I can't help my neuronsto think of him. Sarap kasi lagi mag day dream and never to wake uprealizing
na, shemay, Single pa rin ako!

Heaven's sake! What do I do now? I can't live like this forever! Baka mamuti na buhok ko sa kakaisip. Single life is very fun though. Palabas-labas, gimik here and there, no one to worry about actually. Pero, worry naman ako sa kanya lagi. Saya diba? No commitments, no strings attached. Though my heart has already set aside a space for you.... hoy, hindi ikaw. Siya! My SSS.. Special Someone Sweetie...

Sige na nga. Let's wait and see na lang. Kaya ko ito..I hope. Love goes around and comes around. Love is patient. Love gives, it doesn't expect. Love is..... Siya! Love ko siya! Eto na naman po ako. Hay naku! Tama na sister. Huwag ka ng mag-isip. The right time will come naman eh. Basta, enjoy na lang diba? At least, I know he is giving me the attention.

Tsk..tsk..tsk.. Naku, nag-text siya. Sagutin ko muna. Here we go again....

Pahabol lang ha... Hindi naman ako manhid noh?! So, please lang... makeup your mind, ano ba talaga????!!!!!! Sopla nya ako sa mga hirit nya, hindi ko kaya humirit pabalik. Kahit binabawi nya, nakakatuwang isipin if he means it. Alam ko joke, pero diba.. Jokes are half meant. Paki ulit naman.. para fullmeant na. To tell you the truth mga kaibigan, lahat ng sinasabi nya, maymeaning na! Oh no! Sabi pa naman, In love, everthing around you seems to make sense.

nothing new

2005-07-30T14:27:00.000-07:00

I feel so down today.

1st.. I think I'm losing my bestfriend.
2nd... I just woke up feeling down and all.

Negative vibes na lang lage.

Hayyy.

Looking forward for a gimik tonight. nyahaha. =)

an open letter

2005-07-08T21:08:00.000-07:00

AN OPEN LETTER...

I love you.I love you for your smile. For that pair of eyes that's so easy to read. For that tiny line across your forehead that gives depth to your beautiful face. I love you for the way you can make me laugh. And I love the way I can make you laugh. And I love you for your sweetness, your innocence,your gentle presence...things that are being faked these days. I love the idea of loving you. I love how you touch me...and how you seem to know when I need your presence. I love US when we're together. I love the comfort and security I feel when i'm with you. I love how you're HOME to me. I love taking care of you. I love the way we love each other.

Sadly, I love you and want to be with you in a way that is not possible. You're my friend. I have always tried to live my life facing up to things. But this is not something I can tell you without losing face...without losing you. I cannot risk that. In the relatively short time we've known each other, you have become of extreme value to me.

And yet, I cannot keep my peace completely.I have to somehow tell you, eventhough I doubt that our paths will cross here, or that you'll even know that this is me. I am taking this coward's way because I AM SCARED.

I know that I should probably tell you this. I know that I may forever regret this. I also know that you don't love me in the same way...nor look at me in a remotely romantic way. After all,am just the friend you keep checking up on because you know I am lost right now. Who would love a lost soul anyhow?

Of course, it hurts. And I pray to God that this is one thing I can keep from you.It's my folly to think along romantic lines and if there be a punishment in store for crossing that line between pure friendship & romance...i'd take it alone. It was my choice to fall...I alone should get hurt.

I know that you've just recovered from a painful break-up. And that you're relishing being single again. Still, allow me to make a wish. I wish that next time you love, it will be for keeps. I am praying for God to send you someone you can connect with in the most important of ways...someone who will see the gift that you truly are...someone who will do those things i've planned to do for you...someone you can love in return.

People have said time and again that it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. But what they will probably never understand is how i'll always be a winner for having loved you.

It's been a privilege loving you in my silent,secret way.

Thank you friend for walking into my life.

my friends

2005-07-01T21:25:00.000-07:00

when you get the chance to choose your friends...

i think id pass the chance.....

coz right here is where i want to be....

quotes lang ^^

2005-06-15T16:07:00.000-07:00

"To me, it is enough to have been given a chance to make you see how wonderful it can be. I know you will never be mine, and that in itself is the beauty of all this. And I will never belong to you. But to have given you the promise of beautiful love, it was all worth it. I will be here for you always. I know now that we will be taking care of each other, and that doesn't have to mean an 'everyday'. I know that in time you will find this person with whom you will spend the rest of your life with. And then you will find out that you are capable of so much more... Until that time, let me be your light."

Addicted to Pron??

2005-04-28T17:02:00.000-07:00

Hehehe. Not much.

Started very nice but I gave up on Level 8. Experienced headache and bad tummy after a day of 8 levels. I give up..... Any clue for the 8th level heheh.

Never mind.. have more stuffs to do than thinking about this too much. Grrrh!

Babalikan din kita.. sometime. ahihih

April 28

2005-04-28T16:52:00.000-07:00

Whats with this date?

Well.. today will be one of the days I will never forget in my entire life. My ex for 3 years will be married today. I tried to pretend it was okay with me. I tried to move on but still memories seems to haunt me every night. Three years is quite long and it may take me long enough to forget evrything. Though I have a new one already, I cant help but feel sad about it still. And I am lucky because my present guy understands how I feel. Whew!

Hmm thats all I have to say for now. Sorry. Need to update this sometime.

ANG GAMOT SA NAGDURUGONG PUSO

2005-03-28T19:03:00.000-08:00

Lifted from email

I really don't know how I came up with this... eh una sa lahat wala naman ako prob sa lovelife.... pero wala lang... kahit sabihin kong masaya ako... parang di pa rin ako mapalagay na nakikita at naririnig na sa mundong ito, may mga nasasaktan pa rin... at ang masakit pa nun... ang iba dun ang mga kaibigan ko. I've been hurt so many times na in my life na, minsan pa nga.. mismong kakain ako ng big mac eh te-text ako ng gf ko na pagalit..ayun...sira na nanaman ang araw ko..

Yung mga iba ko namang kaibigan, mas matindi pa ang storya.... pinagpalit daw sila sa iba... kunwari sila ang liligawan, pero yung naglakad pa sa kanila ang siyang nakatuluyan ng lalaki....hanubayun! Whatta sawi moment na maituturing.... pero I made her realize na love is unfair talaga..lalo na pag ikaw ang nadehado. Parang naging survival of the fittest na nga ang nangyayari ngayon sa pag ibig eh... Yung tipong pag maganda ka, gwapo ang makakatuluyan mo, at kapag pangit ka, laking tsamba lang pag may hitsura pa ang napili mo. Eh ako naman di ganun kagwapuhan, di rin cute, minsanlang masabihan na may hitsura, eh di rin pinaligtas ng pag ibig.. haay...puro peklat na talaga tong puso ko.... dahil na rin siguro sa mga
sugat noon.

Ilang taon din akong nagtiis na walang minahal.....or should I say walang nagmamahal sakin? That was the worst period of my life. Yung tipong mahal ko lang ang sarili ko dahil no choice eh.. La naman nagmamahal sakin, wala nga nagkakagusto sakin.. San pa ako? BUT as they always say....IN every cloud, there's a silver lining. Oo tama, dahil sa mga panahong hirap ako sa labylayp.. natutunan ko na rin ang mag survive sa hirap at sakit nadulot ng pag ibig. Nandyan yung aliwin ang sarili sa barkada, pagbabad sa bilyaran o sa computer, pag aliw sa sarili ng ilang oras sa chat... o kaya'y ubusin ng husto ang laman ng ref mo, at sa mga babae naman, eh mag pa parlor, punta sa bahay ng bespren... lahat na para lang makalimutan ang mapait na nakaraan. So ano nga ba talaga ang mga gamot sa nagdurugong puso?

IT IS NOT WHAT YOU DO THAT MAKES THE DIFFERENCE, BUT HOW YOU THINK.

Kahit libutin mo na ang buong luzon para kalimutan siya, kung hindi pa rin magbabago ang mindset mo about love.. sorry dude. WA EPEK... as inwala.. blanko... void.... null... empty set... zero percent...kapos...mintis... airball.... eh bakit?

Material pleasure can't compensate for the pain your heart receives.....and pag ang heart eh nasaktan.. apektado na rin malamang ang utak.. coz they are in mutual status... masaktan ang isa.... masasaktan na rin ang kabila. Try changing your mindset..... kung baga sa computer eh kung panay palpak ang ginagawa ng hardware mo, at nagtataka ka kung bakit nakailang palit kana eh sa karton pa rin ang ending nya, eh baka sa software na mismo ang problema, di ba? Kung basted ka ng babaeng mahal mo..... drinking everynight and bar hopping won't do you good, tska gastos lang yan. Lying in ur bed the whole night and rolling there like a lumpia won't help yah ease the pain. Dapat alam mo na ang gagawin.... PRAY.

Kahit gano ka pa ka demonyo eh sa pagdarasal pa rin ang tuloy mo dude. Totoo yun. Find a time alone na one day, kausapin mo Siya na parang kabarkada mo lang cya.. talk to Him as if kausap mo ang pinaka close na tao sa buhay mo... He can touch the hardest hearts! and the vainest minds. He did that to me and im sure magagawa din nya sa inyo yun. Sa mga iniwanan ng kanilang bf/gf eh wag na wag kayo manonood ng mga movies na may IWANAN na tema.. its like jumping into a quicksand... lalo nyo lang nilubog ang sarili nyo.. sa mga nagsesenti naman... o sige oks lang yan... kasi ako rin ganun e.. di ba nga ang music is the choir of your heart? kahit ga BALDE na ang luha mo kaiiyak sa tune ng One last Cry ni Brian mcKnight eh oks lang un... kahit in reality hindi. Try straightening your goals, point of views, or beliefs. Ano ba talaga ang gusto mo mangyari sa buhay mo? Sa lablayp mo? Siya ba talaga ang mahal mo? Kung siya talaga at di ka nya mahal, is it necessary ba talaga na dapat maging kayo para sumaya ka? Unconditional ba talaga ang love mo for him? Eh bakit naghahanap ka ng kapalit na pagmamahal? Bakit ka nasasaktan pag nalaman mong di ka pala mahal? Ano ba talaga ang definition mo ng loving someone? Bukal ba sa loob mo na masaya ka for her kahit hindi ikaw ang reason ng kanyang happiness? May umiibig bang hindi nabibigo? Pwede ka bang magmahal na hindi nasasaktan? Anong gusto mo, magmahal na masaktan, o hindi mahalin? You see, asking yourself these questions might straighten those curly love lashes of yours. Don't think of your inferiority, yung tipong kesyo pangit ka, may pimples ka, kulang ka sa height, kulang sa pera.... Kasi if the girl or guy dumped you dahil lang sa kakulangan mo sa pisikal na bagay, eh hindi talaga siya deserving na mahalin.. pramis. Ibang tao lang talaga ang bagay para sa kanila. Ikaw ba yung tipong tao na nakikita ang love in a black and white scale? Well...its now the right moment to realize na ang love have gray spots in it.. na hindi lahat ng tama ay tama at di lahat ng mali ay mali. Being not open to these gray spots would spell disaster sa inyong "Getting over" na stage...ano ba talaga tong gray spots na to? Yung tipong people who tend to fallout of love... hindi sa nagsasawa pero bigla na lang nila nalalaman na hindi na pala nila mahal yung gf/bf nila.. there's nothing really wrong about it (sa isang side).. kasi ganun talaga... di naman din nya sinadya na mahalin ka eh.. eh malamang di rin nya sadya ang mawala ang love nya... tamang isipin natin na love is a feeling... but it is not a decision... the decision part comes only when it concerns MAINTAINING the love... so as long as there's a feeling of love.. may decision kang i-maintain yun.... but yun nga.. WHAT'S THE POINT OF MAINTAINING SOMETHING NA WALA NA TALAGA? Eh kung wala nang love... eh wala na talaga. Kung tumagal man kayo, baka awa na lang ang nararamdaman niya to you. That's why it is important na ma clarify mo ang sarili mo sa mga ganitong gray spots.... Wala kang gelplen or boyplen....... SO WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL? sa unang tingin nakakainggit..kasi nga may ka holding hands sila.. may natatawagan para mag ---------- goodnight at i love you at kung anong klaseng panlalambing.... pero kung tutuusin... may kanya kanyang advantage at disadvantage ang pagiging single.

Disadvantages nga ung nabanggit earlier in this paragraph. Ang advantage? You can takecare of yourself, or pag nagaaral ka pa eh you can concentrate on ur thesis...Magagawa mo rin ang di mo magagawa pag meron kayong ka relasyon, tamaba ako? So dont tell me na hindi ka masaya dahil lang sa wala kang gf/bf.... ang dami pang single dyan, and karamihan sa kanila eh masaya din sa buhay nila.. believe me.

Pero we should also take into consideration na masarap din ang feeeling ng na aalagaan.. at minmahal di ba? Well... that's where appreciating what your friends do to you comes into play. Friends or peers will always be there..Yung mga ka barkada mong iniwan mo sa ere para lang dumamubs sa yong girl eh babalik at babalikan mo rin bandang huli.... although hindi talaga healthy na sabihing " Haaay sakit lang sa ulo yang mga lalaki" or "Gastos langang alam ng mga babaeng yan".... we should be fair.... ganun talaga... some will win..some will lose. There's no point getting lost in your life...nakagawa man sila ng mali... sila na ang bahala dun.. they only gave you the opportunity to react... but not the specfic reaction. Kung nasaktan man tayo, hindi na nila problema yun, problema na natin yun. Pag ikaw ba eh nagmukmok sa isang sulok dahil sa ginawa nya eh iiyak ba cya? Hindi. Sa huli ikaw ang kawawa. After a break up..... act and look better. Sa unang rinig eh parang ang hangin ng dating... but the fact is... kailangan mo talaga gawin to.Why? Imagine you just had a break up with your gf or bf.. tapos magpapaka awa effect ka to her... papasuin mo ang sarili mo ng yosi or maglalasing every night or magpupuyat hanggang sa magkaron ka na ng eye bags... tapos bigla ka nakita ng X mo... ano na lang ang sasabihn ng X mo? Kung balikan ka nun eh wag ka na rin matuwa kasi for sure malaki ang probablity nun eh naawa lang cya sayo. Stand tall and proud. HELLO?!?!??! Sino ba cya? As if mamamatay ka pag nawala siya, oo mahal mo siya.... pero kailangan naman mahalin mo rin ang saril mo, a man who can't love himself cannot truly love others..look better not in a way na makakabingwit ka uli ng mga guys pero in a way na hindi ka talaga magmukhang talunan. And besides, pag nagkita kayo, make him/her tell to him/her self... "
Gosh!! Yan ba ung iniwanan ko? How can i let her slip away from me?" O di ba? Kasi kung mukha ka na tlga losyang o dugyot after your break up eh baka lalo lang nya naisip na tama ang naging break up nyo. Explore your world..... kahit mahal natin ang isang tao... we can't move away from the fact na kailangan natin maging exposed... di ba? It's like a butterfly in a bottle of mayonnaise.. di makawala... di makita ng ibang tao ang kanyang kakayahan at kagandahan.... and even worse baka mamatay pa yun, di ba?

Sa mga probs na ganyan... alcohol and cigarettes don't work. Harapin mo na agad ang reality na nangyayari ang mga ganung bagay na hindi natin gusto. Pagsubok lang yan... hindi pa yan kamatayan. Funny coz lagi na lang sinasabi satin na The lord God won't give us problems na hindi natin masosolve... pero still parang nagbibingi-bingian pa rin tayo....natatakot pa rin tyo... Obstacles are what you see when you take your eyes off your goal. Ano ba talaga ang goal mo? Ang magmahal o magkaron ng gf/bf? If you chose the latter, hindi ka talaga magiging happy.... Stop looking for love.. start being lovable. Open your heart to pain.. coz with pain comes happiness.... happiness na hindi kaagad hahanap.. coz it slowly integrates from those little things that you do for love. Wear a smiling face always.... but dont smile alone... baliw ang tawag dun. What i mean is people tend to get close to those whom they know na masaya and maganda ang mindset.

Stop talking and thinking about failures and pain.... coz what you think would most likely attract you. But as always, its easier said than done.... tulad ko... ang dali kong sabihin to kasi im not in a not-so-nice situation.. pero natutunan ko tong mga to from my experience na rin eh... hindi naman talaga madali... pero hindi rin talaga mahirap. Its all in the mind and the heart. Kahit ano pang gawin sayo ng pag ibig..... always open your heart.... dapat laging alive....because you cannot love with a dead heart. Dont ever tell yourself na ikaw ang pinakakawawang nilalang sa pag-ibig.... pano na lang ang mga taong namatayan.... mas masakit yun di ba? Nagkataon lang talaga na iba iba tayo ng problema....

"Letting go of someone dear to you is hard, but holding on to someone who
doesn't even feel the same is much harder. Giving up doesn't mean that you
are weak! It only means that you are strong enough to let go!"

kanta mode

2005-03-13T20:59:00.000-08:00

A Little Bit

I was kinda hesitant to tell you

Should I let you know

I was never really like this before

Need I say more

Or maybe I'm confused when you are near me

I don't know what to do or I should be

There's only one thing in my mind

That's you and me

[Chorus:]

I'm a little bit of crazy

I'm a little bit of a fool

I'm a little bit of lonely

I'm a little bit of all

Oh, I need a cure

Just a little bit of you

And I will fal

lI'm always on the run to see you

Would you allow me to

It wasn't my attention to hurt you

This feeling is true

Or maybe I'm confused when you are near me

I don't know what to do or I should be

There's only one thing in my mind

That's you and me

[Chorus:]

I'm a little bit of crazy

I'm a little bit of a fool

I'm a little bit of lonely

I'm a little bit of all

Oh, I need a cureJust a little bit of you

And I will fall

Torete ^^

2005-02-27T08:06:00.000-08:00

Intro:
D-F#m-Bm-G-; (2x)
Verse I
D F#m
Sandali na lang
Bm G
Maaari bang pagbigyan
D F#m
Aalis na nga
Bm G
Maaari bang hawakan
D F#m
Ang iyong mga kamay
Bm G
Sana ay Maabot ng langit
D F#m
Ang iyong mga ngiti
Bm G
Sana ay maisilip
Refrain:
D F#m
Wag kang mag-alala
Bm G
Di ko ipipilit sa'yo
D F#m
Kahit na lilipad
Bm G
Ang isip ko'y torete sa'yo
Verse II
D F#m
Ilang gabi pa nga lang
Bm G
Nang tayo'y pinagtagpo
D F#m
Na parang may tumulak,
Bm G D
Nanlalamig, nanginginig na ako
F#m
Akala ko nung una
Bm G D
May Bukas pang Ganito
F#m
Mabuti pang umiwas
Bm G-hold
Pero salamat na rin at nagtagpo
Chorus:
D F#m Bm G
Torete, Torete, Torete ako
D F#m Bm G
Torete, Torete, Torete sa'yo
Refrain:
D F#m
Wag kang mag-alala
Bm G
Di ko ipipilit sa'yo
D F#m
Kahit na lilipad
Bm G-hold
Ang isip ko'y torete sa'yo
Repeat Chorus

Songs In My Life

2005-02-16T06:11:00.000-08:00

Here is a fact that you should have known about me by now: I love singing! Yes I really do, even though it seems that sometimes it has been a one way relationship (ahihihihhihi), songs give me solitude much more than movies or tv shows can do. Listening to music makes me daydream endlessly and every song actually reminds me past and present experiences, no matter how sad, happy or cheesy they are. Now I guess I prefer to be in the cheesy mood (as I’ve always been). Let me enumerate the songs that remind me the past guys of my life.

Nagtatanong ang isip, di daw maintindihan

Kung ano ang nararamdaman

Dapat mong malaman sa puso ko’y ikaw lamang ang nagiisa…

Kahit kailan, di kita iiwanKahit kailan, di kita pababayaan

Kahit kailan, kahit kailan

I was only 13 when I meet Mr. D in a swimming party of a family friend. Coming from an all girls’ school, I thought that every guy I meet and see was cute, cool and nice, and so in short, I got attracted to him (now it made me wonder why I did ahihihih). He was 19 then. Actually there was never us, formally speaking. It was a plain MU thingy but I remembered that we both agreed on a date to somehow would be our celebration of being “together” in our own meaning. That date was on April 7, 1996 and eventually we parted ways on June 26, 1996, merely 2 days before my birthday.

There are times when I just want to look at your face with the stars in the night

There are times when I just want to feel your embrace in a cold night

I just can’t believe that you are mine now

You were just a dream that I once knew

Never thought I will be right for you

I just can’t compare you with anything in this world

You’re all I need to be with forevermore.

Four years later, on June 28, 2000, I committed myself to Mr. R1 (Note: This is R1 because there is another R2. J) If I would categorize which guys on my list I had my first serious relationship with, then Mr. R1 would be it. I could say that I have loved this guy so much and that I have sacrificed a lot for him. I was 17 then and he helped me grow up (partially, though). But then again, our relationship proved wrong the saying that first love never dies because it died after a year and a month of being together. And I cried a river because I expected a lot in that relationship and I was hoping that we would end up being together. You know, the idea of my-first-love-would-be-the-guy-I-will-be-married-with thing. Very teenager thinking I must say hahahaha.

All my life, without a doubt

I give you All my life

now and forever till the Day I die,

you and I will share

All the things this changing world can offer

So I sing, I'd be happy just to

Stay this way, spend each day, with you

There was a time, that I just thought

That I would lose my mind

You came along and then the sun did shine

We started on our way

I do recall that every moment spent Was wasted time

but then I chose to lay it on the line

When my relationship with Mr. R1 ended, I was feeling really down and out and I sought refuge in the Church. I began being active in the Church, started attending mass EVERYDAY (now I don’t anymore heehee) and I even became a choir member of the Legion of Mary Choir in Sto. Domingo. There I met Mr. A1 (yes ATlans 1! amp!), our guitarist. (weakness ko kasi ang musically inclined ahihhih)I’ve known him for quite some time already and I never imagined being “us”. But then one time, I started looking at him differently. I started noticing the way his hair was gently tucked behind his hair, the way his eyes were singkit, the way his laughs begin from a little grin, the way his fingers strums the guitar.. everything… I became captivated by his moves but I kept mum about it because I never wanted to be in a relationship anymore after what happened. We became close, eventually and we started texting each other (uso na text noon and I even have a small notebook where lahat ng text nya isinulat ko with matching dat and time. Huh picture me writing down while reading his texts!) Then one time I received a business card that read: “I luv you”. I knew right then and there where it came from. (shmpre lakas ng intuitions ko anoh!) So what I did was I did the same thing and sent it to him. That started the spark and there was no formalities or whatever and I was contented that he was just there beside me. I was contented that way because I knew before hand that he has a girlfriend and he was going to be a father soon. On Christmas day that year, I’ve decided to end whatever was going between us, We were just sitting side by side but I felt that he was miles away from me. He texted me something that says “ bakit ganito? Anong nagyayari? Bakit kailangang magkaganito?” – stuffs like that. And then I cried. I spent that night crying because we actually said goodbye to each other because he was going to be married soon. That broke my heart very much and I have never cried that much in my entire life. I know he loved me, I know he was serious because he even told the president of our choir and also asked for his advice. I know it was love, but it happened at a wrong time. You see, we haven’t kissed, we haven’t even held hands (once lang nung nag Our Father na sa mass) and I don’t even remember knowing what his surname qas! All that mattered to me that time was the “feeling” we both had.

Sandali na lang

Maari bang pagbigyan

Aalis na nga

Maaari bang hawakan

ang iyong mga kamay

Sana ay maabot ng langit

ang iyong mga ngiti

Sana ay masilip

Wag kang mag-alala

Di ko ipipilit sa 'yo

Kahit na lilipad

ang isip ko'y torete sa 'yo

This song reminds me of Mr. M, a cousin of my bestfriend who was 2 years younger than me. This was played in her debut and we had MU thing ulit. Nothing special. Pangkilig lang actually hahaha. Kasama den itong son gna ito : Though it seems I have everything I dont wanna be a lonely fool All of the women, all the expensive cars, all the money don't amount to you. So I can make believe I have everything, but I can't pretend that I don't see. That without you girl my life is incomplete. O di ba.. san ka pa haha

Spend all your time waiting for that second chance
For the break that will make it ok
There's always some reason to feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction oh beautiful release
Memories seep from my veins
They may be empty and weightless
and maybe I'll find some peace tonight
In the arms of an Angel
fly away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room,
and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of an Angel
may you find some comfort here

This song reminds me of Mr. R2 in my life. He was the angel I was referring to in my previous blog. Hmmm nabasa mo nb ung sa baba? ahihihi

All my life was a paper

once plain, pure and white

till you moved with your pen

changin' moods now and then

till the balance was right.

Then you added some music,

ev'ry note was in place

And anybody could see

all the changes in me

by the look on my face.

And you decorated my life

created a world where dreams are apart.

And you decorated my life

by paintin' your love all over my heart...

You decorated my life.

Hmm.. this song was just one of the 16 songs we had compiled for our wedding. Yap.. this Mr. R3 was the guy i thought I would finally get married with. We were born on the same date that was 28 (I was June and he was October), our destiny number (the single number you get when u add all the digits in the numerical value of your birthday) was both 1, our signs are compatible (me, Cancer and he was Scorpio) and he was the first guy I introduced my mom to. He was the 2nd serious relationship I had and having him in my life has brought a lot of things to learn and none to regret. This relationship taught me a lot. It opened my eyes that not all fairy tales come true, that love doesn’t need to rely on how long you have been together but how you have spent each moment being together. I don’t want to discuss on this anymore. Topic closed already ahihhi.

Babe I'm leaving

I must be on my way

Time is passing by (hek tama ba lyrics??chorus n nga lang)

You know its you babe

Whenever i get weary and i had it all

feel like giving it up

you know its you babe

Giving me the courage and the strength I need

Please believe

babe i love you

This song reminds me of Ms. A2 (uu na atlans 2 naman ngayon!). Yes you read it right. She was a he. She was a lesbian but read this right: I didn’t have a relationship with her. We were just friends plain and simple. She paved the way for my relationship with Mr. R3 legalized at home. It was because I stayed at her house and I didn’t come home for the first time and Mr. R3 called me up at my house and had the courage to ask my mom my whereabouts.

If I’m not in love with you
What is this I’m going through tonight
And if this heart is lying then
What should I believe in
Why do I go crazy
Everytime I think about you baby
Why do I want you like I do
If I’m not in love with you

This song was being played when I was thinking about my friend, Mr. A3( another A.. eheheh Atlans 3? galengnoh 3 pala letter A na tao sa buhay ko haha... and ges wat. they all starte and end with the same letters. Starts with A and ends with N. hahahaha). He is a college friend from another course in my school. I never thought that I would fall for him but I did. I even had the guts to tell him so. He also admitted that he had feelings for me before. But then we agreed not to take it seriously. And until now, we remain friends and I guess we will always be the ka-tropapips. He knows me more than anyone does.

Kissing you is not what I had planned
And now I'm not so sure just where I stand
I wasn't looking for true love
But now you're looking at me
You're the only one I can think of
You're the only one I see
All I need
Is just a little more time
To be sure what I feel
Is it all in my mind
Cause it seems so hard to believe
That you're all I need
Yes it's true we've all been hurt before
But it doesn't seem to matter anymore
It may be a chance we're taking
But it always comes to this
If this isn't love we're making
Then I don't know what it is
All I need
Is just a little more time
To be sure what I feel
Is it all in my mind
Cause it seems so hard to believe
No stars are out tonight
But we're shining our own light
And it's never felt so bright
Cause girl the way I'm feeling
It's easy to believe
That you're all I need

I am in a relationship now. And yet I find this song best describes what I feeling now. I just hope it will last. Lahat naman tayo ganito diba. I know I fall in love very easily. It is because I focus more on the feeling that I am having. I maybe wrong in my opinions in love. But then that's the way i am. I will always be a hopeless romantic.

singing mode

2005-02-09T03:21:00.000-08:00

i just wanted to sing today ahihih...

If I'm Not In Love With You
by Kathy Troccoli

If I'm not in love with you
What is this I'm going through, tonight?
And if this heart is lying then
What should I believe in?
Why do I go crazy?
Every time I think about you baby
Why else do I want you like I do?
If I'm not in love with you
And if I don't need your touch
Why do I miss you so much, tonight?
If it's just infatuation
Then why is my heart aching
To hold you forever
Give a part of me I thought I'd never
Give again to someone I could lose
If I'm not in love with you
Oh, why in every fantasy
Do I feel your arms embracing me?
Like lovers lost in sweet desire
And why in dreams do I surrender
Like a little baby
How do I explain this feeling?
Someone tell me
If I'm not in love with you
What is this I'm going through, tonight?
And if this heart is lying then
What should I believe in?
Why do I go crazy?
Every time I think about you baby
Why else do I want you like I do...
If I'm not in love with
If I'm not in love with
If I'm not in love with you...