Kill Me When November Comes
Im falling into an abyss of mixed emotions. As the days come close to the month of November, I feel like dying slowly day by day. I keep on saying that Im okay... that I have recovered... that I don't cry anymore... but deep inside me I know Im still broken... I am still shattered.
Why does it have to be this way. Why does it have to end so unexpectedly. All I asked for was a space between us so that we can have a chance to know ourselves better. I held on to my pride because I want him to learn something. But he gave up on me and decided to start a life of his own.
June 30 could have been our wedding date... By November, it could have been me that would be giving birth to the child he has been longing for...No matter how I keep on reminding myself that God paved the way of separating us because of His own reasons, I just keep on holding on. God knows the best for me and He knows that I have a lot of dreams before me. He knows that starting a family is not yet on my list. But as the stubborn-headed girl that I am, I still let my emotions overrule my sanity.
Love is the best feeling there is... but this experience made me fear what is beyond loving. Does it have to mean we have to risk being hurt? Does love means that we have to endure the pain? Does love means that we just have to let go?
I am not sure what the answers are. I just cant get my eyes off the calendar and start counting the days til November.
posted by angelgirl at
5:28 PM
4 Comments:
isa lang masasabi ko... yel wak ka na drama dami naman kaw boys e... tsaka si ano...
hi mariel,
miss you na! ok lang yan men can be jerks and liars but who are they anyway :) go girl! go on!
extra:
hope you can join with us sa swimming sa galera this nov11-12 :)
overnight kina junar ng nov 10 then nov 11 ng madaling araw yung byahe
just contact me nalang or iba nating friends. kwentuhan galore tayo
haha! i was amused with your entry title. while some people prefer to tell you to "Wake Me Up When September Ends", you instruct other people the opposite: "Kill Me When November Comes". :p
i just noticed that most people (blogger) who i come across with these past few weeks are emotionally sensitive. hang in there! it will pass. ;)
astig talaga toh si YeLLer! the best! Na miss ko ang whapak Yel! kaya lang ayoko na maglaro kahit si emong ayaw na din. mukhang hindi na tayo magkikita-kita in-game. huhuhuhu T_T
kita kitz na lang pag may gimik! inuman na toh!
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