Friday, August 05, 2005

Platonic Love

Matagal ko na siyang kilala...siguro mga isang taon na. Lagi ko siyang kasama. Pero mare, hindi kami eh. Wala lang, labas lang...gimik lang daw. Date ba? Hindi eh.. masyadong sensitive kasi yung word na date. But my friends say, DATE daw! Nakakakilabot naman yung word diba? Pareho talaga trip namin sa buhay. Hindi kami nauubusan ng mapag-usapan. Kahit paulit-ulit, okay lang. Kahit corny, okay lang. Basta, makausap ko sya. Period. Marinig ko lang boses nya na nagsasabi, "Busy ka ba?" Kahit sangkatutak na deadlines ang dapat kong gawin, I would simply lie just to be able to talk to him. Kahit pibe minutes lang, solve na araw ko.

Haay... ano ba talaga brother? May gusto ko ba sakin or wala? Anak ng pitongpu't pitong puting tupa, can somebody give me a correct answer? Gulong-gulo na ako! On the other hand, it's always nice to pondereveryday about the big question. Does he like me? May crush ba siya sakin? Sarap na talagang hiritan. Pero, SHY AKO EH! Is it time to be kapal-muks? ****!Pano pag sinabi nya, YES, I DO LIKE YOU. Syeter! Pero masakit pag sinabi nya, You are such a nice friend to me. Syetest! Ouch talaga!

But what can I expect? Ako si girl. Laging maiden-in waiting who dream of a knight-in-shining-armor guy who would swept me off my feet. Though, effective na napapablush

Relax my inner conscience. Say banana. Hinga.....banana. Sige pa,banana. Teka, bakit banana? Focus. Oh no sago, sya ang nasa isip ko! I am actually beginning to miss him more everyday. Miss kaya nya ako? Mag pa miss kaya ako. I have been planning not to text him for a long time to see what would he respond. Pero, di ko matiis. Fingers for texting..control. Yung billng cellphone ko, lumaglapas na hanggang langit. What if I lie sa phone at hindi ko sya kausapin for how many days? Will he give a damn about it?
Sana... Sana hahanapin nya ako like a police.

So, should I face the music or not? Should I take the risk to lay down all my cards and say, Bahala na kahit hindi nya ako gusto basta nasabi ko na feelings ko. Pero, pano nga pagwala syang pagtingin sakin? Wa poise!Will it change my outlook towards him? Will he look at me in a differentlight
din? Oh Lord, I need prayers. Mag Novena kaya ako sa Baclaran with matching luhod papuntang altar. Or kaya, ipadaan ko kaya sa third party? Ang panget naman. I wanna be honest also.. like I always do when I am with him.Chika
ka dyan sister! Honest daw! Eh ito puso mo, kumikirot at tatalsik na sa kalsada ng EDSA at di mo parin masabi na gusto mo siya. Maniwala ka dunsa, Our friendship will never change ek-ek.

Expect the worst but hope for the best. Yun ang motto ko ever since. Motto ng mga singles yan! But I have been expecting. I can't help my neuronsto think of him. Sarap kasi lagi mag day dream and never to wake uprealizing
na, shemay, Single pa rin ako!

Heaven's sake! What do I do now? I can't live like this forever! Baka mamuti na buhok ko sa kakaisip. Single life is very fun though. Palabas-labas, gimik here and there, no one to worry about actually. Pero, worry naman ako sa kanya lagi. Saya diba? No commitments, no strings attached. Though my heart has already set aside a space for you.... hoy, hindi ikaw. Siya! My SSS.. Special Someone Sweetie...

Sige na nga. Let's wait and see na lang. Kaya ko ito..I hope. Love goes around and comes around. Love is patient. Love gives, it doesn't expect. Love is..... Siya! Love ko siya! Eto na naman po ako. Hay naku! Tama na sister. Huwag ka ng mag-isip. The right time will come naman eh. Basta, enjoy na lang diba? At least, I know he is giving me the attention.

Tsk..tsk..tsk.. Naku, nag-text siya. Sagutin ko muna. Here we go again....

Pahabol lang ha... Hindi naman ako manhid noh?! So, please lang... makeup your mind, ano ba talaga????!!!!!! Sopla nya ako sa mga hirit nya, hindi ko kaya humirit pabalik. Kahit binabawi nya, nakakatuwang isipin if he means it. Alam ko joke, pero diba.. Jokes are half meant. Paki ulit naman.. para fullmeant na. To tell you the truth mga kaibigan, lahat ng sinasabi nya, maymeaning na! Oh no! Sabi pa naman, In love, everthing around you seems to make sense.

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